hIm
by 0928soubi at docomo.ne.jp
Summary: A neverending fic about Kei and Sho's relationship. Marriage. Crack. Angst. More Crack. Yaoi. Smut in later chapters. More Angst, and memories. KeixSho, some GakuHai
1. Chapter 1

h.I.m (Honey, I'm Mooning)  
(Interprate this however you want to. It's a bunch of stupid semi-formed ideas thrown together. 1) A spoof of a movie title 2) the word "Him" 3) Mooning...either a butt or the moon. If it's a butt, it's probably Toshi's, simply because his character seems like the type to moon someone for no reason in particular. 4) Honeymoon -gasp!- 5) the capital 'I' in him..."I am him" ....again, I don't think things through. PD)

Warning: Foul language. Quite a bit. XD

Disclaimer: I don't own Moon Child.

(a/n) HOLY CRAP I TYPED IT ALL. I DON'T THINK I'LL EVER BE ABLE TO WRITE OR PLAY GUITAR EVER AGAIN. I CANNOT FEEL MY HANDS. T.T AND I AM NOT EXAGGERATING. By the way, I'm not actually sure if Toshi and Sho are related, so for all intents and purposes, in all of my fiction, unless otherwise stated, he is just his buddy, and of no blood relation. It will make sense that I'm saying this later, I promise.

Thanks to Cashite-sama, for attempting to read this all the way through. Even though you quit somewhere in the middle of what, the third journal I wrote this story in? I am very grateful. XD Thank you for your patience and such. I'm sorry if your eyes and brain are still bleeding from the strain of trying to read and comprehend this.

ON WITH THE STORY

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"And then, I'll whisk you away to Tahiti, and you'll say 'Oh, Sho! My knight in shining armor, I love you, please, let me show my love for you with my sexy, pale body!'"

"Sho, like I'd ever say that."

"Of course you would, Kei!"

"Sho, where did you get this insane ability to make every thought that goes through your mind incredibly insane, tacky, and old movie-styled?"

"From YOU, of course!"

"Like HELL you did, Sho. Were you hitting the bong with Shinji?"

"No!"

"Than it was Toshi's 'Super Special Spazzy Mushroom Pizza?'"

"No!"

"Then what?"

"I guess I was just BORN tacky."

"Perhaps it has something to do with a previous life of yours, eh, Gackt?"

"Gackt? Who the hell is that?"

"Where did you hear that name, Sho?"

"From you."

"No, you didn't."

"Yeah, I did! You said it!"

"When?"

"Just now!"

"I did? Oh, crap..."

"Tell me who he is!"

"Well, during my early years as a vampire, before you were born, there was a famous musician in Japan. He was incredibly -in my opinion, anyway- tacky. Very like you, Sho."

"Huh? Whaddya mean?! Are you calling me tacky?!"

"Yes, Sho. But besides that, he loooved leather. Always, anytime you saw him, there was at least one item on him that was made of leather."

"Seriously? No wonder I remind you of him."

"That's not all. He could be very childish."

"Hey!"

"Don't deny it, Sho. You're a big baby, and we ALL know it.

"Sh-shut up!"

"He was a pervert, too. I remember this one song he had; Vanilla...heh heh heh..."

"Kei?"

"Not only that, but he was--no. You'll get pissed."

"Huh? What is it, Kei? Tell me!"

"I don't know...are you sure?"

"YES!! Tell me, Kei!"

"Okay. He was amazing in bed, too--"

"YOU WENT TO BED WITH HIM?! How could you?!"

"It was before I knew you, Sho--"

"So?! Kei, did you even KNOW him?!"

"I'll only tell you if you shut up, and let me finish, okay?"

"Fine."

"Thank you. Anyway. So I was in Tokyo -Luka had gone to see someone in Osaka- and I met Gacchan--"

"GACCHAN??"

"Shut up, Sho!"

"Fine. *hmph*"

"Thank you. As I was saying; I met GACCHAN in the airport. He was just arriving from the states, I from London--"

"You lived in LONDON?!"

"Sho. I swear to God, I'll kill you, Sho, if you don't stop interrupting me!"

"Well, I'm sorry, Kei, I can't help it that your life was, is, so fucking interesting! ...I'll shut up now."

"*puff* So. We arrived, and it turned out that due to something with the weather or a health risk or something, no one could leave the airport. The airport had a hotel, and Gacchan immediately got the last room. He saw me, or rather, heard my swearing, and he shouted "HYDE!" He then proceeded to run up to me and hug me like an idiot, while I yelled and tried to break free. He eventually realized that I wasn't this 'Hyde' person, and he felt so bad about his practically molesting me that he invited me to share his room. What is it, Sho?"

"Uh, right. So, the two of you SHARED A BED?!"

"Of course not, Sho! The only time we shared a bed was while we fucked, and well, after we fucked."

"Wh-what?! You had sex with him after twenty minutes, even though it took you fourteen years to even CONSIDER bedding me?!"

"Now, now. That's no where NEAR true! It only took me fourteen years to ACT on it. I had CONSIDERED fucking you QUITE often, beginning right after you hit puberty..."

"K-Kei!"

"What? It's not MY fault that you decided that no matter what clothes I offered you, you chose to wear those thin, see-through, skin-tight gym shorts that you got from a dollar store..."

"Th-they were see-through?!"

"Of course, Sho. Why do you think every time you walked by us Shinji yelled at you to cover yourself, and both Toshi and I ran to the closest seperate places we could find a cold shower?"

"K-Kei?!"

"Oh, COME on!"

"I didn't realize it affected Toshi, too..."

"It affected EVERYONE, Sho, and--wait. You knew it affected me?"

Sho grinned. "Of course! Why ELSE would I wear such ridiculous pants?"

"I often wonder that now..."

"Heh heh...Wait. What's wrong with the pants I wear now?"

"They're the same as the shorts, Sho."

"But they cover my ------!"

"But they're SO tight, you may as well be naked! Which brings me back to my story about Gackto..."

"o_O"

"As I was saying...lessee...ah, yes. So, as we were walking to the room--"

"You said you didn't share a bed, right?"

"The room had two twin beds, Sho."

"You really don't like my--"

"I like your pants, okay? I just don't like how everyone else looks at you when you wear them."

"But I like how YOU look at me when I wear them. *smirk*"

"*blush* Sho! Then...then only wear them when we're alone?"

"We strip so quickly that it won't matter. I could wear plaid flannel and you wouldn't notice."

"That's not true!"

"Oh, yeah?"

"I'm a vampire, Sho. What are seconds to you are hours for me. One 'glance' towards you is like -for me- having you be the only thing I see. You're all there is for me."

"All you want to fuck, anyway."

"That is...partially true. I'll admit to that, like an ADULT, Sho. I admit to my flaws."

"I HARDLY think it a flaw."

"Well, your childness CAN be pretty cute..."

"What's that have to do with anything?"

"As I was saying--"

"Hold on. So when we have sex--"

"If you were the same as me, it'd be like fucking for about a month rather than a few hours. No. Don't even ask. I won't change you, Sho, unless I have another choice. And you're too far away for me to change you now, so put away the gun."

"Damn it."

"Gacchan was annoyingly persistant too."

"Kei!"

"I've completely forgotten my point now."

"You were telling me about...Gackt." came the pissy voice.

"Mn...let's see now...ah, yes. So, he told me on the way to the hotel room that Hyde was his lover. Well, in Gacchan's mind, anyway. He was a bit of a lothario."

"A what now?"

"Look it up later."

"But, Kei! I don't want to!" he whined into the reciever.

"Anywho, so this Hyde person was more or less the man that Gacchan had a crush on. He barely bothered to hide it, if at all."

"Ah, I see--man?"

"You thought he confused me for a woman?"

"It wouldn't be the first time."

"Fuck you."

"Gladly."

"Shut up."

"And behold, he did shut up."

"Hyde, it seems, looked exactly like me, except -at the time- his hair was a little darker than mine. Well this man, Gackt, he was QUITE sexy."

"Hmph."

"It's a compliment to you, Sho."

"How?"

"You're identical. Except, he didn't have your braids. Sho, you would not be half as enticing to me if--no. You'd still be sexy without your braids. Bald, you would be sexy. Military buzz cut even. Hell, you're just damn sexy, Sho."

"How true."

"Dumbass. It seemed that Gacchan was suffering. He loved Hyde-kun very much, but was afraid to truly act on his desires and just fuck him senseless."

Sho stared at the phone in his hand, blushing at his lover's crude language. "Pervert..." he muttered, just quietly enough that Kei couldn't hear it over the phone.

"Which really only confirms my belief that you're his reincarnation."

"What's that supposed to mean? I told you!"

"After fourteen years."

"You didn't tell me!"

"That'd be damn near pedophilia!"

"So?"

"So, that's illegal."

"That's--we're in Mallepa! No one would care!"

"Your brother and Toshi would've."

"They don't now!"

"Yes they do. They mind very much that we're together, but they try not to show it too much outwardly out of respect for you. They realize that this was your choice, and that I realize how dangerous I am."

"You're not dangerous!"

"Only an idiot would think--heh. Nevermind."

"Finish your point! I wanna know exactly how he got into your pants so quickly."

"Long story short, we were both horny, and he wanted to 'practice' so he could work up the courage to be with Hyde-kun, and--"

"That's IT?! You didn't even know if this Hyde guy is real, and you sympathize with him, and you slept--"

"I looked him up on the computer. He was legit, and he looked...well, identical. He even had a picture where he was blonde with his hair slicked back."

"Did he look like you?"

"Of course."

"Kei..."

"Yes?"

"How did they..." he stopped before saying 'die?'"...no. Did they get together?"

"Much to Hyde's fiance's dismay, yes, they did."

"Did they stay together?"

"'Til death did they part."

"They married?!"

"Yes."

"And...we are them?"

"Yes."

"Our fate...will be the same?"

"It could be."

"I-I see..."

"We could get married too, you know."

"What?"

"If you want to, there's no law against it."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"I-I love you, Kei."

"I love you too, Sho."

"Kei?"

"Yes?"

"Marry me."

"N-now?"

"Yup. I'm at a church. People have married via webcam before. Why can't we get married over the phone?"

"Sho, we don't have the papers!"

"A-actually, I had Shinji get a lawyer to d-draw them up a w-while ago."

"Sho." Kei was breathless. "I'm...I'm...I'm speechless."

"So? What do you say? Will you marry me right now, Kei?"

"I...I--"

"K-Kei?"

"How could you be so stupid?"

"Kei?" Sho's face fell.

"Of course, Sho. You seriously thought I'd say NO? Idiot. I. Love. You. What do you not understand about that?"

"(Shinji:) Asshole. (Toshi:) Wow. THAT was your vow?"

"What?"

"(Toshi:) You've been on speaker this entire time, Kei."

"E-eh?!"

"(Son:) Wow. And I thought THEY were messed up." Yi-Che piped up, speaking into the phone over her brother's shoulder. "Disgusting. I thought you were the normal one."

Kei glared at his phone. "Frigid little bitch."

"(Sho:) Give me the damn phone. (Toshi:) Swearing in a fucking church! What the hell is WRONG with you, Sho?! Besides the fact that you're in love with...him. (Sho:) Toshi! (Toshi:) At least I didn't call him an 'it.'"

"Sho." Kei used his 'sultry' voice, intoxicating everyone with it's sweetness.

"Y-yes?"

"Marry me."

"O-okay."

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"I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now, uh, do as you will."

"Wait wait wait wait wait. Hold on a minute. Husband and WHAT exactly?!"

There was a crackling noise as Sho stepped into the apartment. "Wife. He said 'wife.'"

"Sh-sh-SHO!" Kei jumped from his chair and ran into Sho's arms. "Sho...Sho..."

Sho clutched the smaller man to himself. "Here's your ring, Kei. We're married."

"A diamond? I'm not a girl, Sh--wait. I-i-is this...r-real?"

Sho smiled. "The reason that we've been so hard-pressed for money, Kei, and the real reason I went away for so long,"

"You make it sound like you were gone for months."

"I'm sure for both of us, it was years."

"Sho." Kei leaned against Sho's chest.

"They wouldn't marry us here, and I figured it was too close to Chan. But, I kind of took alot of the money from our heists to pay for the ring. Even Toshi and Shinji helped; Son and Yi-Che too, although I don't think she realized what the money was for. Heh heh."

"It's, it's beautiful."

"I love you, Kei."

"I love you too, Sho."

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"You ass, you lied to me! You said you would still be gone for another month!"

"I wasn't lying. I came here to pick up my bride and leave for my honeymoon. " When Sho said he came to pick his bride up, unfortunately for Kei, he meant it literally.

"SHO! Put me down, now! Sho!" Kei kicked and hollered, hiding his grin with his bangs.

"So, tell me the rest of the story."

"Not until you put me down!"

"But it's tradition."

"I don't care!"

"Tell me the rest, and I'll put you down."

"Fine! Alright already! So, we were stuck in this airport for three days. Before you ask, yes, we shared the room the entire time. By the time we got to the room, we were both frustated, lonely, horny, and drunk."

"Drunk?"

"We stopped and got some booze on the way."

"So, when did you start drinking?"

"When I was fourteen. I got drunk at a party an upperclassman invited me to. But that's another story entirely."

"But I want to hear what happened!"

"Luka happened."

"What?!"

"Let me finish this, I'll tell you that later."

"Promise."

"I promise."

"Alright. Then continue."

"So, we got to the room, looked into each other's eyes, locked the door, and...THINGS...happened. For three nights, that was what it was like. It was the best sex I ever had."

"But...But I'm better, right?"

"You ARE him, Sho."

"Answer me."

"No. He was better."

"AAAGH!!" Sho kicked open the door of the apartment complex, leading to the street. The poor piece of wood howled in pain as Sho took his despair out on it with a particularly well-aimed high kick.

"I'm sorry, Sho. This man, his life was all sex-drive. Not that it's a bad thing, but you've only ever been with me."

"That's not true, Kei."

"What?"

"One time, Toshi and I, we got drunk. Really drunk."

"No. I don't want to hear it."

"Kei..."

"I don't care. Just tell me. Where was I?"

"It was before you and I got together, both times."

"BOTH?"

"We were drunk!"

"When, Sho?"

"When I was fourteen, nineteen, and twenty."

"TWICE?? What happened to TWICE?!"

"And when I was eighteen."

"Any more times I should know about?"

"Only those times, I swear!"

"You will pay for it."

"I'm sure I will."

"*fume*"

"If it helps, it was always your name that I called, when, you know...Aw, c'mon, it's not like I was cheating!"

"So, we continued to meet periodically for the next three years."

"WHAT did you just say?!"

"Aw, c'mon, it's not like I was cheeeating!"

"I do NOT sound like that."

"Yes, you do. HE didn't though. AND he knew so MANY tricks..."

"Tricks? Like what?"

"Well, he did this wicked thing with his tongue..."

"When I tried that, you hit me!"

"He was so good...mn...you couldn't help but get lost in the sensations..."

"Kei!"

"You asked. So tell me, how was he?"

"Tight."

"YOU topped?"

"Once I hit puberty. When we were fourteen, no."

"You got drunk when you were FOURTEEN?"

"So did you!"

"I didn't have a choice!"

"There's always a choice!"

"Not when you're being raped."

"Luka--"

"No. Luka saved me."

"He didn't change you?"

"Do I LOOK fourteen?"

Sho mentally stepped back and looked really hard. "No. What happened? Wait--was that all there was to the Gackt story?"

"Pretty much." Sho set him down, hailed a cab, and let Kei get in first.

"Where to, Sho?"

"The airport."

"T-Tahiti?"

"Sorry, Kei." A sheepish look crossed Sho's face. "I couldn't afford it, even if I hadn't gotten you the ring. I promise you, though. I WILL be your knight in shining armor and take you there someday."

"You'll whisk me away for a week?"

"Or longer, if you want!"

"Well, as long as you don't carry me there like *door opens* you're doing *gets out* now! *picked up* Shooo!"

"Chill out, Kei. If you hide your face in my neck, everyone will think you're a flat-chested girl." Still carrying his wife, Sho walked to check-in. "Heck, I don't think it'll matter either way. What do you want to bet that they'll still confuse you for a woman?"

"At the moment, all I have that I can bet is whether or not you sleep alone tonight or not."

"That's still a fifty percent positive out come."

"Do you really want to risk it?"

Sho stopped in front of security. "Not in the least."

"(Security:) Sir, we need to check your passports, papers, and bags."

Sho blankly stared at the man. "And?"

Nervously, the man added, "Please put the young woman down."

Sho grinned, leaning down to whisper in the blonde man's ear "Told ya. We get to--"

Kei glared up at his husband as he stepped down. "My face was hidden, and I didn't bet you."

Sho, yelling, stopped him. "Kei, remember your legs!"

"(Sec:) Sir?"

Sho gave Kei an odd look. "Should I tell him?"

Not knowing what he was up to, and deciding that he probably didn't want to know, he handed Sho the reigns. "Go ahead. You'll do what you want anyway."

"Well you see, Kei here is handicapped. No use of the legs at all."

"Really now? That's terrible." The security guard fidgeted with his hat awkwardly, trying to look intimadating.

"Yes, yes. It's very sad." Sho nodded his agreement.

"Doesn't the kid have a wheel chair?" The security guard asked, still a bit suspicious.

"They wouldn't let me take it on the plane." And Kei came in for the assist...

The security officer's heart melted at the sight of such a young, innocent, beautiful girl being faced with such a terrible obstacle. "Oh, you poor thing."

And he's at the ten, the twenty-- "Quite. So you see, if I don't carry Kei-chan, then we can't get to the plane."

"Couldn't you wheel her at least to the terminal?" Sob story or not, he still had responsibilities.

"We forgot our change for an airport one, and we didn't want to leave my wheelchair here where it could get stolen." And it looks like he's going to make it--

"Don't you have someone who could take it?" The security guard was doing his best to put up a fierce front.

Here, Kei and Sho looked at each other, holding one another's hands and looking very alone. "No. We're all alone; all that one another has."

"No parents? Friends?"

Sho started--"Both dead. And friends? Never had any." Kei received the pass flawlessly--

"So you are brother--" Aw, and an interception by the other team--

"And si--" Sho grabbed his chance, before a steal by his own partner!

"We're siblings, yes." Kei elbowed him, running to the finish line all alone--

"Well, you can go ahead. Straight through that door and take a left. You'll find your terminal there." AND IT'S A GOAL!!!!

Kei politely thanked the man, allowing Sho to carry him just until they were out of the security guard's sight. When Sho didn't let him down, he glared up at the younger man. "Brother and SISTER? Really?!"

"It's all I could think of on such short notice!" Sho laughed, gripping Kei tightly as he used his butt to push open a door.

"Oh, bullshit."

"I thought I was being clever."

"Why the hell did you make up such a stupid story?! I'm an invalid now, who's an orphan with no friends? And YOU'RE the OLDER BROTHER?!"

"YOU said that we had no friends."

"Well, aside from you, that's pretty damn true."

"What about To--"

"No. He still hates me."

"Son--"

"I suppose...but we're not close. More like...acquaintences."

"You're closer than THAT."

"Maybe so, but not by much." Kei boarded the plane.

"It's a miracle! You can walk!" Sho shouted, just in time to see Kei trip on the floor and fall indignantly on his face. "Or not." XD

"Shut your mouth and help me up already." Kei blushed a pretty shade of pink. "Fuck. I think I really DID hurt my leg."

"Poor, uncoordinated Kei," Sho laughed, before adding with a serious look: "Want me to kiss it and make it better?"

"Are you stupid? Of course I don't want that--kiyaah!" He looked down to find that Sho had pushed up his pant leg and was actually planning to kiss hisleg. "What the fuck, Sho?! *smack*"

"What? You used to do that to me!"

"You were like, seven!"

"Nine, actually." They recieved odd looks from everyone around.

"You still had the mentality of a three year old, Sho!"

"If I hadn't, I probably wouldn't have gone up to you when we first met."

"What?" He allowed Sho to carry him.

He gently set the blonde man on his feet as they stepped onto the plane and found their aisle. He smiled gently as he put the bags away, the fact that they were married and on their way to their first mystery -to Kei, anyway- vacation spot together.

"F-first class, Sho?"

He smiled as Kei's blush of wonder. "Yeah."

"Wow."

"Kei?"

"Yes?"

"I didn't mean that I thought I made a stupid decision when I decided to be with you. If it had been, I wouldn't need you as fiercely as I do now; we wouldn't still be together."

"W...what if we were?"

"Then there would be no love between us, maybe one sided."

"On whose part?"

"Me, you...maybe both."

"Huh?"

"We would be too afraid of rejection and hate to confess. I can see it now. It would be like it was when you came back."

"Which time?"

"When I was seventeen."

"Oh...what about it?"

"We were so, so stand-offish, it hurt."

"Until you broke down and cried, hugging me so hard that I was afraid YOU would break ME."

"It's not funny, Kei."

"Damn right it's not funny." Kei huffed as he threw himself into his cushy seat.

"Exactly."

"Yes. Athat's the year you had your growth spurt, and overtook me by at least a foot."

"Heh."

"It's not funny!"

"I think so."

"Ah, the image of you...looking so lost, all alone in the world...so tall...you were what, six foot two?"

"Six foot two?"

"How they measure height in the States."

"Is that...good?"

"No! It's not! It's FAR too tall for any normal human being!" As an afterthought, 'Then again, he's never been normal. Maybe...an alien?!'

"How tall are you?"

"mhrm-mmphm."

"Huh?"

"I said -cough-"

"What was that?"

"Five two. I'm five two, Sho."

"..."

"Stuff it."

"..."

"Shaddup."

"Ahahahhahhahhahahahaah!"

Kei -descreetly- punched the shit out of him.

"Ow...Kei, that hurt!"

"And?"

"...asshole..."

"What was that?"

"Nothing!"

"That's what I thought."

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"Ladies and gentlemen, you are now free to roam about the cabin." The seat-buckled sign flickered off, and just in time too.

"MOVE!" Sho practically jumped over Kei, sprinting furiously to the bathroom.

Kei called over his shoulder, "I told you not to drink alcohol on your first take-off!"

As he chuckled to himself, flipping through the Sky Mall magazine and dog earring several pages, a woman peaked over the seat in front of him. "So...how old is your friend?"

Without looking up, he asked "Why do you want to know?"

"Just curious." came the non-chalant reply.

"Well, keep it to yourself." He muttered, as her friend peaked over the other seat. He winced at her nasaly, squealy voice.

"Hey, what's his name?"

K: "None of your business."

The first leering girl ignored his answer. "Is he dating someone?"

"I--" He was cutoff by the second leering girl.

"Then, he's single?"

"N--" Again, he was cut off by a barrage of questions.

"What's his type?"

"I said n--"

"Is he straight?"

"Would you let me fin--"

"Is he Asian? I think he's Asian."  
"Oh, but he's so tall!"

"Would you quit--"

"Hey, how do you know him?"  
"Are you close?"  
"You've gotta be close, if you know so much about him, right?"  
"Yeah, yeah! How long have you been friends?"  
"Does he have any girl friends? Like friends who just happen to be girls, not actual girlfriend, girlfriend?"

"DAMN IT, WILL YOU SHUT--" Just as Kei was about to snap, -and by that, I mean their necks- the two girl's lives were spared.

"Would you two kindly stop bombarding MY WIFE with questions, please? She often gets very bad migranes." Sho leaned over the back of his chair, his arms resting on the top, and his braids cascading over his shoulder.

The first girl stared at the beautiful man before her dreamily. "Huh? Wife?"

Kei snapped her out of her dream like state. "THAT'S RIGHT. I'm his WIFE. And I would REALLY appreciate it if you would stop hitting on him." Sho smiled down at Kei.

"Isn't Kei-chan cute when he's trying to decide the best way to kill someone without anybody noticing?" Sho beamed, sliding into his seat and wrapping his left arm around Kei's shoulders.

The more annoying of the two got the picture and sank dejectedly into her seat, pulling her friend down with her. "S-sorry to bother you t-two." She muffled her friend's protests with her hand until she quieted down a bit.

Kei glared down at the man's lap. "Damn those tight pants of yours."

Sho laughed, a humongous grin on his face.

"...What is it?"

"You called yourself my...'wife.'"

"S-So?"

"It was sexy. VERY sexy."

"Don't even think about it."

"Don't think about...what?"

"There is NO WAY that we're having sex on a plane, Sho. NO."

"\P")"

"Sho, I'm telling you! N-no!"

"\P)"

"No. No! I refuse, Sho! REFUSE!"

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"I can't...believe...we just..."

"Joined the mile-high club? -^.^-"

"You ass, you planned that, didn't you? Waited until we were at least a mile up..."

"It's possible."

Kei fumed, trying incredibly hard to ignore how exhilirating it had been.

"It's also possible that I just reeeally wanted to get you naked."

"See, THAT I don't believe."

"You don't? Why not?" He followed Kei back to their seats.

"Maybe if you had said you just really wanted sex, I would've believed you, but..."

"What, you don't think that I like looking at you?"

"Not really."

"Well, why wouldn't I? Kei, you're beautiful and stunning. You're strong, and sexy, and cute. I love every bit of you, inside and out."

"Even my pancreas? My appendix, and other useless human organs?"

"Yup. Even you appendix, no matter how useless it is."

Kei pouted cutely, something he rarely did in the presence of anyone other than Sho, if ever. "If you just wanted to see me naked, then why did we...you know."

"I said I wanted to see you nude, not that I would have any self-control once I did."

"Oh. OH!"

"Besides, I couldn't just leave you there that way...moaning...flushed...and breathing SO HARD..."

"Sh-shut up."

"Okay." Sho reached over, slipping his hand around Kei's.

The blonde man sighed contentedly, leaning against his husband's broad shoulders. He looked through the window into the dark night sky. He glanced around the cabin, finding everyone else was asleep. After a few moments of just basking in each other's presence, he was the first to break the silence. "So where are we headed?"

"It's a surprise."

"Of course it is."

"You don't like surprises?"

"When you live as long as I have, the only kind of surprises left for you are the bad kind."

"Hmph. Well, at least we'll be together whenever a bad surprise happens, right?"

"God I hope so, Sho. God, I hope so."

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"He's kidding, right?" Sho stared at the employee, who was prattling on in some obscure language with an odd accent.

"_Sir, I'm sorry, but you will have to stay here until this is cleared up."_

"Kei, what the hell is he saying? Hell, what language is he even SPEAKING?"

"He's speaking English. He's saying that we're not allowed to leave the airport."

"What?! Why not?!" Sho yelled, trying his best not to throw a fit.

Kei politely asked in English, _"Excuse me, sir, but why aren't we allowed to leave?"_

"_Employee: There has been an outbreak of a deadly flu."_

"_Really?"_ Kei's eyebrows rose.

_"Yes. The H1N1 virus, to be precise."_

_"S-swine flu? Are you serious?"_

_"Yes ma'am, dead serious."_

'What a joke.' "Sho, let's go see if they have any rooms we can stay in for the night.

"Okay." Sho picked up the rolling luggage, and tried to take Kei's bag from him. "Hey, Kei?"

Kei moved it to the other side in the blink of an eye, not planning to let Sho show off. "Yes?"

"Since when do you speak English?"

"I've been able to speak it for a long time."

"Really? Why didn't you teach me?"

"I tried to. The only thing you seemed to remember were nonsensical 'swear words' that Shinji and Toshi taught you."

"Seriously? NOTHING else?"

"Well, you remembered _'Romantic.'"_

"That's English?"

"Yes, Sho."

"Oh. Cool!"

"..."

"^.^"

"Look. They have room we can stay in here."

_"Clerk: How may I help you, sir?"_

'See that Sho?! She called me SIR!!' "_Yes, do you have any open rooms?"_

Click, clack, came the tap of her fingers flying over the keys. "_I'm sorry, sir. We're all full due to all of the flight cancellations_."

Sho put the baggage down, leaning across the desk. "Oh, you must have SOMETHING."

"_O-oh. Uhm. What do you know? There's one left. Here are your room keys_."

"Thank you, miss." Sho took the keys from her with a smile.

The clerk blushed, staring after the beautiful foreigner.

"Wow." Kei took the room key from its protective sleeve.

Sho glanced at him. "What?"

"You charmed her without even speaking the same language."

"I-I don't know about THAT, but..."

Kei spotted a vendor selling beer, and quickly found his wallet in his bag. "Two, please."

_"May I see your I.D.?"_

"I've got it." Sho showed his I.D. instead.

"Thank you. Here you go."

Kei handed him a beer, sipping the white foam off the top of his. "Are you really so unaware of other's eyes on you. Sho?"

"I'm not COMPLETELY unaware!"

"Oh really now?"

He stopped in front of Kei, leaning down to give him a soft kiss. "I notice when YOU look at me."

"Heh. Well, at least there's that."

"K-Kei?"

"Yeah?"

"Um. Does this all seem a bit...I don't know..."

"Familiar?"

"Yeah."

"A little. Why?"

"Because we're in an airport..."

"M-hm?"

"There's a deadly disease keeping us here--"

"Swine flu? It's HARDLY deadly."

"To vampires, maybe."

"No, with humans too. I've seen it before. It's only mildly contagious, and only a handful of people die of it; most were either old or very young, and the ones that weren't were already sick. The common cold is more deadly. Well, perhaps that's a bit of an exaggeration, but you get the point."

"Then why are we stuck here?"

"They're over-reacting."

"Hm. Well, anyway, we're stuck in an airport because of a disease, I got the last room here, and we're sharing it; we just got some beer; we're on our way to getting drunk,"

"And?"

"Remember what you told me about Gackt?"

"Hn."

"It's exactly like that."

"I suppose. It's rather different, but there ARE some similarities."

"What else did you say...he had a thing for some guy, right? I have a thing for you, and regardless of what everyone else thinks, you ARE a guy."

"True."

"But my love for you isn't unrequited. At least, not anymore." Sho smooched his love as he pushed Kei against the door.

Kei unlocked it deftly from behind him, pushing his way in and kicking the door closed behind them, breaking the smooch. "Mn." He turned, walking to the bed and leaning against it, using his arms to support him. "So, how do you suggest we pass the time?"

"You said you would tell me about when you were fourteen."

"Innuendo, Sho. It was inuendo."

"Oh. Um...well."

"You'd rather hear about my life than have sex?"

"Y-yeah. Wait, why not both."

"One or the other, Sho."

"You were talking about a party..."

"So I was. Let's see...I was fourteen. Someone -I think it was either a junior or a senior- invited me to a party. I, of course, didn't refuse. When I showed up, half of the party goers were already wasted--drugs, beer, you name it, they were on it. I was handed a cup--the drink was clear, so I assumed it was water."

"What was it?"

"Vodka, everclear, probably both."

"And you were FOURTEEN?"

"Yes. I took the drink. There was an open spot on a couch, so I sat down. Someone started to talk to me--I answered politely, until the alcohol began to kick in. When it did, my words slurred, and my mind became slush...The person...I can't even remember his face, but, I remember what I was thinking. His face--it was so frightening. I knew what was going to happen...he was going to rape me, and I was too drunk to fight him off."

"Kei..." Sho sat on the bed, putting his arms on either side of him.

"I'm--I'm fine." he sighed, leaning into Sho's warm embrace.

"Did he...?"

"Yes," Kei buried his face in Sho's shirt, clinging to him. "But...but half way through,"

"Go on."

"Someone started yelling at him, and, and they pulled him off, out of, me."

"Do you know who saved you?"

"Luka did."

"Luka knew? Well why didn't you ask him and find out?"

"What? Oh. Um, no Sho, Luka is the one who saved me. That party is where he and I first met. He kicked the crap out of the man who had...hurt...me, picked me up, carried me to his car... The look he had when he asked where I lived...it was so serious, that despite the circumstances, I couldn't help but laugh."

"YOU laughed at someone because they were being serious?!"

"What can I say, I was young and drunk."

"Oh, THAT excuses everything."

"I let you get away with a hell of a lot of stuff just for that reason."

"No, you let it go 'cuz you're a pedophile, and you liked my butt!"

"Be that as it may--"

"Gawd, you're a pervert, Kei!"

"Oh, shut up."

"Heh. So, where DID you live, Kei?"

"The pier."

"Are you serious?!"

"That's exactly what Luka said when I told him. He drove me away from that house, but he didn't take me 'home.' We went to his apartment, and, before you ask, nothing happened. All he did was give me something to help with my headache, and a place to bathe and crash for the night."

"Hold on--you already had a headache?"

"It was my first drink! I was only a kid!"

"Hm, so you've always gotten bad headaches?"

"Yep. Got SO much worse when I met you."

"Hey!"

"He let me sleep in his bed that morning, while he slept on the couch. He--he had dreams. The same dreams over and over until the day he died, just like I have."

"Were his about his creator too?"

"Sometimes. The events in the dreams, he said, were always the same, but his knowledge in the dreams was often different."

"I don't get it."

"His thoughts--sometimes the things he knew in his dreams differed from his conscious mind. His thoughts and dream knowledge were always accurate, but the events of the dreams the same. In a way, it was as if sometimes he could know the future, if that makes sense."

"Do YOU have dreams like that?"

"Only once."

"When?"

"The day Luka died, right before I met you. When you tried to steal my watch,"

"..." Sho blushed at the memory.

"and I grabbed for your hand, I had been having a dream where I knew that I was going to find a reason to live, and I knew I had to protect and love this reason, or I would lose everything."

"Everything?"

"More like I would have nothing to lose. Oddly enough, I didn't want that."

"Who would, Kei?"

"Hn. I just, I just wanted to make sure that SOMEONE remembered me. The thought of being forgotten, of my life having not meant anything to anyone anywhere, scared the shit out of me. I decided that I wanted to be in someone's memories, even if all they did was fear me, at least I would be there, in the back of their mind."

"Bull shit."

"What?"

"You and I know full well that if someone was afraid of you, you would come back from the dead to either set 'em straight, or give them something to be afraid of."

"That's not true?"

"Kei, don't lie to yourself."

"Hmph." He tried to sit up, but Sho grabbed him and set him in his lap like one would a child.

"Don't get pissy, Kei."

"Who's being pissy?!"

"You are."

"So? Maybe I just WANT to be pissy."

"Then be pissy," Sho lifted his chin, "but be pissy while kissing me." He leaned in for a kiss, when--

Kei turned away at the last possible moment, giving Sho a mouthful of blonde hair."Sorry, you chose the story of my life over a physical manifestation of our feelings."

"N-not even a KISS, Kei?!"

"When I woke up," Kei stood. "the next morning,"

"Kei!" Sho followed him like a puppy around the room.

"Which, in reality,"

"Kei!"

"Was only an hour or so from the time I fell asleep,"

"Kei!!" Sho grabbed him, and tried to throw him on the bed, just to find that he was too strong. "Damn, you're strong." he muttered, out of breath.

Kei flopped back on the bed effortlessly. "Luka was still asleep, and all the windows were closed with the curtains drawn."

Sho climbed above him on the bed."Okay..."

"When I tried to sneak out with some food--"

"WHAT?!"

"Don't act like you haven't had to choose between stealing food or starving to death, Sho. Hell, that's how we -you- live now!"

"We don't have to, you know."

"Neither of us have any formal schooling, Sho."

"Kei, you went to school!"

"Over half a century ago! They won't have record of that, and even if they did, they wouldn't believe it was mine."

"Why not start over? You're short enough to pass for a grade schooler--OW!"

"Fuck you. As I was leaving, he stopped me."

"With his MIND?"

"No. He physically stopped me. Stood up, grabbed my arms, closed the door."

"I'm a little disappointed, Kei." Sho resumed trying to kiss Kei's neck, but his head was in the way, and it wouldn't move, so he gave up with a grin. "I would've expected you to go out the window."

"While it is true that I never gave a damn about my physical well being -other than at that party- I wasn't about to break my leg."

"Pussy." Kei grabbed Sho's cheeks (face!) "O-ooow! Kei!"

Kei pursed his lips. "And you call ME a pussy."

"You're the one I always fuck."

"Except for Toshi."

"Enough about that!"

"No. If you didn't want me to say anything, you shouldn't have told me."

"I was coming clean!"

"And?"

"And...and..."

"Luka started to fall -it was daylight outside, so he was weak- I caught him, and figured that after what he had done for me, I couldn't just leave him."

"Did you live together?"

"So I covered him up, after laying him down and I-"

"Kei?" he stopped,.

"-made him a drink-"

"Kei."

"He was so gracious. Even though it was sunny-"

"Answer me."

"-outside, he stayed awake, and we talked. He even took the water." He laughed a melancholy laugh, before the tears slowly came, his painfully strong facade slowling falling away at the memories.

--------------------------

(a/n) A terrible stopping place, but it just keeps going on and on and on and oooooonnnnn...Damn my brain. I can't yell at myself enough for writing something so damn long...yeah, that's right. This chapter isn't anywhere NEAR being even an EIGHTH of what I have written...GAAAAH!!!!! I think this is actually the longest single chappie I've ever written. XD I would like to apologize for the bit of American football 'humor' I tried to throw in there. It started very unintentionally, but once it started, it just couldn't be stopped--!! I couldn't resist the bit about the swine flu...The big 'scare' had just started when I was writing this...

Please reeeviiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeww! OR SHINJI'S FLYING KOI WILL EEEEEAT YOOOOOU!!


	2. Chapter One and a Half

h.I.m SIDE STORY NUMERO UNO!!

[a/n] Buahahahahaaa...admittedly, I had forever planned to just say "That's it, no more!!" as far as the actual GakuHai goes...but after such a LOVELY pair of reviews, (and a severe case of an odd form of writer's block whichi doesn't keep me froom writing, rather, kept me from writing WELL...) I felt inspired! So hereagoes... 8D *spazzes*  
Typed this while listening to The Underneath's 'Fall'

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"Hyde! Haaaiiiiiidde!!" Yelling, Gackt ran, flying down the halls of Haunted Records, in search of his close friend. He didn't pause at the odd looks he recieved from the people going to and from various rooms in the office building.

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"Actually, I was thinking of something more along the lines of this..." the youthful-looking brunette was hunched over, scribbling something on a legal pad as Gackt burst in the room with a flourish, ignoring the bewildered faces of Hyde's agent and various staff members. He paused, turning to look at his fellow musician. "G-gackt? What are you doing here?" Sadly, used to Gackt's abnormalties, his flashy entrance went unnoticed by Hyde.

"Hyde! There you are!" Gackt strode over to his 'crush,' grabbing his hands, pen and all. "I need to talk to you." Chocolate eyes met crystal blue. Gackt let go of his hands as Hyde turned and said they'd continue the meeting later. They walked into the hall and to a side room, both ignoring the staff members' minute protests.

Hyde followed him in, closing the door behind them. He turned, facing the taller man. Running his hand through his hair, he laughed. "What the hell are you doing here, Gacchan?"

Glad that Hyde wasn't planning to yell at him for spiriting him away from his important business meeting, he returned the grin. "Well, for starters, I missed you while I was away."

With a skeptical glance and a scoff, the shorter man plopped down beside his friend on a couch. "Like hell you did."

Gackt turned his body toward the other man. "No, really. I'm serious!" Hyde turned away, huffing.

"You didn't even call or send an email...not even a text! You can't really say that you missed me."

Placing his hands on either of Hyde's shoulders, he gave him his most bewitching -hopefully- smile. "Of course I can say that, 'cuz it's true!"

Hyde pinched his grinning cheeks. "Ah, whatever. Now why else are you here? And ew," he pulled back, wiping his fingers on the couch cushion. "You're sweating like a pig. Did you run all the way here?"

Gackt visibly paled. He couldn't just tell him that he was sweating from nervousness about confessing his love to him, could he? His brief time with Kei had certainly taken care of some of his more difficult anxieties and...frustrations, but it was different with the real Hyde sitting so close to him and looking so...corruptable. "Actually," he took some tissues from the box on the table beside them, wiping his forehead. "I came here to tell you something very important."

Hyde took a cigarette packet from his inner coat pocket and a lighter from his left pants pocket. "Alright," he murmered around the cigarette, lighting it. "What is it?"

Gackt nervously lit a cigarette of his own. "Uh, well..." the silence grew awkwardly between them. Bored and slightly nervous, Hyde started making smoke rings, trying to ignore the way his friend was looking at him. Said friend was entranced, watching his love and unconsciously starting to blow smoke rings of his own. He drew in a deep breath as he stubbed out the rest of the cigarette. He watched as Hyde carefully did the same. "I came here to ask you how you really feel about Megumi-san."

Hyde coughed, not making eye contact. "She's my fiancee. How do you think I feel?"

His blue eyes followed his every move, catalogued every hidden glance and awkward shift. "I think that you're only going through with this because you feel you have to, or because you're trying to muffle something inside of you." Hyde stood, walking to one of windows. He let the sound of silence sit for awhile before he followed him to the window. Gackt wrapped his around Hyde's waist, resting his chin in the crook of the shorter man's neck, bending over slightly to do so.

Hyde smiled as he nuzzled into his neck, breathing him in deeply. He set his head atop Gackt's, content with their moment. "I suppose a part of it's that...but I also..." he paused, breathing in Gackt's scent. "I also care about her."

Gackt muttered _"I _care about _you_..." against Hyde's neck, lightly pressing his lips against Hyde's collar bone. He smiled as he heard the other man swallow nervously. He stood up straight, turning the shorter man around and hugging him to his chest.

"I...I care about you too..." He tremble, trying to suppress his emotions and failing.

"I love you, Hyde." his hands moved up, wrapping around his shoulders.

"Why're you doing this?" Gackt watched as his deep brown eyes began to fill with tears.

He sighed, holding him tighter. "Because I don't want us to end."

Hyde broke free of his embrace, tears running down his cheeks. "No! No! This is too much...A-and, and there IS no 'us!' Not anymore...we agreed that, that after all the rumors about us started, that we should stop even hanging out!" Hyde backed away, staring at the floor.

"Hyde. That's the only reason I've held out this long. I promise you, I've done everything possible to try and move on--"

Hyde glared up at the taller man, looking like his head was about to start spinning around. "Move on? Move _on_?! There was never anything to move on from! You make it sound like we were together!"

Gackt started to get frenzied himself. "We may as well've been!"

Hyde had become a ball of fire. "A drunken kiss here or there doesn't mean shit, and you know that!"

Gackt stopped, looking forlornly to Hyde. "But what if I wasn't drunk? What if I WANTED to mean something?"

Hyde stopped dead in his tracks, his mouth dropping. "Don't say that."

Gackt stepped closer to him. "It's tru--"

"DON'T say that. _Please_." Hyde looked away until his secret love gently put his hand to his face and turned him back.

"I love you, Hyde. That won't change." He jumped as Hyde slipped forward, hugging Gackt around the waist.

"I've tried to forget, to suppress it." Gackt's arms surrounded him, and Hyde moved his hand to the front of Gackt's shirt, clinging to him.

"Wanted to suppress...?"

Hyde looked up at him before muttering into his shirt. "My feelings...my feelings for you."

Gackt felt as if he was soaring. "B-but why? Why would you try to stifle something as beautiful as love?"

"Because I didn't think it'd work for us, what with our fame, and our genders, and your reputation..."

A pause. "Reputation? What reputation?" Gackt looked down his nose at the shorter man.

"...nevermind." Gackt let it go, hugging Hyde tightly.

"Well, anyways...does this mean that you're okay with us being together now?"

Hyde returned his embrace. "Hm? What do you mean?"

A light blush dusted Gackt's cheeks. "You know...TOGETHER..."

Hyde paused just long enough for Gackt to start worrying. "Are you asking if I'll be your boyfriend?"

Gackt turned scarlet. "Ah, w-well, I, uhm, that is to say...well, life is like a big sock, and--" Hyde laughed at the nonsensical Gackt.

"You're really weird, know that?" Gackt's face looked as if it were on fire.

"S-s-so?"

Hyde grinned, hugging his friend tightly. "Oh, alright. I GUESS we can date."

Gackt let out the breath he didn't realize he was holding in. "You have no idea how happy that makes me."

Hyde stood on his toes, lightly pressing his lips against his new love's expecting ones. "I think...I do."

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[a/n] The next chapter's suuuuuuuper long, I'm gonna warn you now...if you plan to read it (which I pray you will) all the way through, it's best you stock up on supplies now...blankets, enough food to last you about a week, some water bottles...

XD Okay, it's not THAT bad, but it's close... XD

PLEASE REVIEW!!!


	3. Chapter 2

Warning: Super-cheesy Sho stupid-ness. XD And veeeery out of character...everyone! 8D Foul language too... SCREW NORMAL TIMELINES!!! XDX ...Gackt is officially a trans-dimensional being, so he doesn't age, and, uh...as the time-space continuum fluctuates, this story's timeline may begin to make sense, and, uh...

Disclaimer: Hm...I don't wear enough leather to be confused for Gackt...OR DO I?!! No. I don't. XD Soooo, I'm not Gaaackt, and I don't oooown MooooonChiiiiild...!

(a/n) I apologize to the world, officially, for writing something that absolutely neeeever ends, and is so bloody long that I killed my flashdrive trying to save the chapters on it. T.T **_WHY?!!!_** I'M AN OTAKU, I DON'T HAVE MONEY FOR ANOTHER FREAKING FLASHDRIVE!!! GAAAAH!!!

I...uh...have a confession to make...I almost posted the next chapter before I posted this one...which would've REALLY confused you guys... XD as the story already doesn't make sense...so I'll put both up. ^.^ NO BETA IN THEIR RIGHT MIND WOULD EVER READ/WORK THROUGH THIS. So don't blame me...

Thanks to:

angelicbutterfly777  
Sayuri  
Jaded

for reviewing! ^.^

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Sho layed down on his side, clutching Kei to him. "Don't cry, Kei. Please." He rubbed his lover's back, comforting him as best he could. "I've only seen you cry twice before this, you know that? Once, when you thought I had gotten lost, and you -of course- found me. I was what, ten?"

"..."

"And you cried again when I came home, to whisk you away for our honeymoon."

"I didn't cry yesterday."

"On the inside, you were definitely crying."

"Bull crap."

"I distinctly remember seeing a tear on your cheek."

"Like hell you did."

"Aw, I know that you were happy."

"I still am."

"See?" Sho tried to steal a kiss from him, but Kei covered Sho's lips with his hands before he could.

"But I didn't cry. I can't cry."

"Why not?"

"I lost my tear ducts in the war..."

"Which one?"

"It was a joke, Sho."

"It wasn't very funny. Besides, if you can't cry, then how can you be crying now?"

"Again, it was a joke, Sho."

"Oh." He set his head atop Kei's, letting time pass comfortably. "Are you okay now?"

"I think so. Where did I leave off?" His eyes trailed Sho for a few moments as the taller man wandered around the room.

"It was the bit about how you spent the day with Luka after he saved you."

"Right. Luka and I--What the hell are you doing?"

"What do you mean?"

"Are you--are you eating the food from the minibar?!"

"Well, yeah. Why not?"

"Sho, you're not supposed to eat the stuff from the minibar!"

"If they don't want me eating it, then why put it there?"

"To get you to eat it! They charge you for everything you take!"

"Huh. That's weird."

"Not as weird as you."

"Ha ha ha. Very funny." He kept eating the candy bar, then put the wrapper back so it looked like no one had eaten it. "Hey, Kei. Why do you always change the subject like that?"

"What's it matter?"

"I don't know, it just seems like you're hiding something."

"I have things that I don't like to talk about. It's nothing strange."

"The way you deal with it is."

"Fine. I change the subject often because I like to, so shut up."

"Hmph." He laid beside Kei again, huffing. "Be that way then."

"I plan to. As I was saying," He paused to move Sho's hands back above his waist area. "Luka was very good to me that day. Eventually, when night fell, he took me to a diner near the bridge, and he paid for my food. I left and went home."

"So? Seems like a pretty uneventful day to me."

"For you, maybe. The way he treated me that day, he was so kind. Sho, I had never been treated humanely before in my life."

"It's a bit ironic that you're talking about a vampire being humane."

"So you deny that I act human?"

"...Well..."

He sighed softly, brushing his hair back with his hand. "About three months later,"

"Changing the subject again..."

"Trying to keep myself from kicking your ass, here."

"Sorry, sorry...go on with your story." Kei stared at him. "Seriously. I really want to know."

"About three months later, I was sitting under the bridge, cold and half-dead. Luka came by, just on a stroll, he said, and nearly fell over when he saw me. Once he shook himself free of the shock, and could speak coherently again, the first thing he said was _'You weren't kidding. You really did...DO live under a bridge! Or is this a recent development?'_ I, of course,"

"Being the smart ass that you are,"

"Just glared at him," Kei accented this statement with a glare at his idiot. "and yelled that he should _'just fuck off.'_"

"I thought the two of you were on good terms?"

"Not yet. Besides, I was cold, sick, tired, starving...nearly dead. I couldn't help but be a little pissy."

"To the one person willing to help you...?"

"It seems that's always been a bad habit of mine-- maybe that explains my attitude towards you sometimes, Sho."

"Heh. So," he smirked, kissing Kei. "Did he change you then?"

"No. I was fifteen then."

"You had had a birthday?"

"As a matter of fact, it had been just the day before. You know, I still can't believe you would do something so romantic for my birthday, Sho. I was so happy."

"What are you talking about?"

"Proposing to me, stupid."

"H-huh--Oh, uhm, yeah. Proposing to you. Right. Uhm. Happy, uh, birthday, Kei."

"Thank you."

_'Holy shiiiiit shit shit shit **sheeeeeyit,'**_ Sho frantically -yet unconspicously- looked around the room. _'How in the HELL could I FORGET something like THAT?!!!! STUPID, STUPID, _**STUPID!!**_'_ "So, wow, that's interesting, y'know, that he came the day after your birthday..."

"Hm? I suppose. Later, when he found out that he had missed my birthday, he bought me a birthday cake, and...you know that silver plated lighter I have?"

"The one with the inscription?"

"Yes. _'Forever shall you see the light in all darknesses.'_ He gave that to me then."

"You smoked back then?"

"I picked the habit up after our first meeting, while I was still living under the bridge."

"Mm...how cliche. Both the smoking under a bridge thing, and that lame inscription." Sho cringed as Kei smacked him. "Oh, come ON. Even _I_ wouldn't say something like that."

"Whatever you say, Sho." A pause. "I refused to live with Luka at first, prefering to rely on myself. That didn't deter him, though. He had a big heart, and he didn't want to see me die, apparently. So, he came by every once in a while to check on me. Gradually, the visits increased to every other week. Then, once a week. Twice. Three times, until soon, he was there bugging the shit out of me every night. Heh. I tried to hate him at first--tried to be annoyed, but really, I was just happy that someone would even bother to pretend to care about me, a lonely little street punk."

"He didn't care about you?"

"Yes, he did, but--"

"You aren't just empathizing with ME, are you? I remind you of you, when you were younger, so you are pretending to like me more than Luka did you?"

"If that were the case, you would never have gotten into my pants." Kei deadpanned, frankly.

"Hm...you're probably right. So, is there anything else you have to say about Luka?"

"Well, one night, about two months after he started coming to visit me, he didn't show up. I waited up until morning, but still, no Luka. The next night, the same exact thing. So when he didn't show up on the third night, I went to look for him."

"Where? You'd only met him somewhere other than the pier once, right?"

"Yes, but he took me to his apartment when we first met, remember?"

"That sounds wrong."

"When I got to his building, I could see that a light was on in his apartment. Being the stupid kid that I was, I climbed up the fire escape, and slipped into his--"

"Pants."

"No! WINDOW. I climbed--"

"Into?"

"THROUGH his window--"

"Then what'd you climb into?"

"His APARTMENT, THROUGH his WINDOW." Kei all but yelled at the man beside him.

"Oh."

"All of the lights were off in that room, so I stumbled around for probably a good twenty minutes looking for the light switch. When I found it and turned it on, I found Luka sitting sprawled across the couch, a massive -for him- grin on his face..."

* * *

_"U-uh...Y-you hadn't come by in a while." Luka tilted his head upwards, looking at the teen from under his bangs. "I-I thought something might've happened, s-so I--" Luka stood, "L-look, Luka-san, th-the, th-the w-window--uhm. No--the, uh, the l-l-light was--" he walked over to the boy, the young, human Kei. "Fuck! Stop looking at me like that! It's making me..." Luka cornered Kei, pressing him against the wall with his body, one arm propped up on the right side of Kei's face._

_"Makes you WHAT, Kei?"_

_"Uhm, please don't be so familiar with me." Kei's cheeks turned a pretty, dusty pink._

_He smirked, laughing tauntingly. "You never seemed to mind before."_

_"I didn't mind before because you weren't looking at me like I was a piece of meat!" He laughed nervously, too embarassed to look the older man in the eye, and too afraid to turn away._

_"I don't see you as food, Kei. Well, I DO, but I don't think of you that way."_

_"Still." He made it a point to look Luka in the eye, while keeping his neck completely concealed with his face._

_"I won't bite you, Kei."_

_"It's not the notion of you BITING me that frightens me."_

_"No?" Luka leaned in close, whispering hotly in a teenage Kei's ear. "What then?"_

_"L-luka-san..."_

_"Please, just call me 'Luka.'"_

_"L-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-Luka?"_

_"Yes, Kei?" He grinned like a jackal at the curious red blush on the teen's face._

* * *

"Hold on, Kei. Why were you so nervous?"

"I thought he was going to try to...you know!!" Kei blushed awkwardly, a shade reminiscent of the one he had sported often during his budding 'friendship' with Luka. "You'd be freaking out too!"

"Oh, as if." Sho rolled his eyes mockingly.

"Oh really? You think so?"

"Rea--" His eyes widened as an extremely predatory look flashed across Kei's face as he crawled over him, dipping his head low, close to his face. He started stuttering as a graceful hand came to grip his neck tightly, though incredibly possessively and sensually. "K-K-Kei?"

"Kei-SAMA."

"K-k-k-k-k-k-kei -s-s-sama...?"

"Yes, Sho?"

"A-a-are you g-g-going to--" His breath caught in his throat as Kei leaned forward, breathing sexily against his ear.

"Yes?"

"Uh-uh...uhm," He paled at the feline grin that graced Kei's features.

"What, NERVOUS, Sho?" He laughed merrily as he leaned back on the bed, using his arms to prop him up.

"K-kei-sama?"

"Stop calling me that, Sho."

"But you just said--"

"I was showing you how Luka was able to freak me out, stupid."

"I-I'm not stupid!!"

* * *

_"Luka, you're too close."_

_"Oh, really? Because I think that I'm not close enough." He ground his hips against Kei's predatorily._

_"Luka! Back off!" Kei pushed against the older man's chest with his fists, but to no avail. He shivered as Luka lightly kissed his neck. "Luka! Stop!" His voice was clotted with desperation._

_"Do you understand now, Kei? I'm a monster." Luka stepped back, his expression blank. "If I get hungry enough, I'll kill you, maybe worse, Kei. I won't think, I won't feel. I'll just kill."_

_"And afterward?" Kei began to calm down as Luka moved back over to the couch._

_"I would hate myself. But still, I would live. I kill others so that I may survive. I'm...I'm not human, Kei."_

_"Well, _duh._ I know that. Was all of this just a way to freak me out?" Kei glared at the brunette viciously. "Because seriously, I knew you weren't human the first time I met you."_

_"...You're kidding, right?"_

_"No. I already knew that you were a vampire. You didn't have to scare the shit out of me, you ass!"_

_"I-I'm sorry?"_

_"Damn right you are!" Kei turned away from the older man, walking back to the window. "Well, I came to see if you were okay, and now I see that you're okay, so I'll be going now."_

_"Wait! Kei, I-I'm sorry. But...but you were worried about me."_

_"I was being selfish."_

_"Not wanting to be lonely is not selfish."_

_"Still."_

_"Regardless, I'm happy that you got worried, and that you came here on your own. So, I take it you've reconsidered my offer?" Luka twiddled his thumbs awkwardly from the couch._

_"What offer."_

_"You know perfectly well what offer!" After an awkward silence with no response, he added "Will you live with me?"_

_A pause. "Two weeks. I'll stay for two weeks. But if I don't like it, I'll leave."_

_"Agreed."_

_"Okay. Uhm, where will I stay?"_

_"As I don't sleep at night, you can sleep in my room."_

_"I don't sleep at night either."_

_"Well, that's a problem then, isn't it? How about tomorrow I give you some money and you go buy a second bed?"_

_"That's a waste of money, especially if I only stay here for two weeks." Kei replied frugally._

_"You're not going to be staying for only two weeks..." Luka murmered._

_"You say something?" the blonde asked, absent mindedly._

_"Just wondering where you'll be sleeping."_

_"Your bed...it's a king size?"_

_"Yes."_

_"We could both fit on there, couldn't we?"_

_"Quite comfortably, considering your size." Luka laughed at the murmered 'fuck you' that came mysteriously from the window. "But you'd still do that? Even after what just happened?"_

_"You were only joking, weren't you? So why would it be a problem?"_

_"Uh...ye-yeah..."_

* * *

"Sooo...how long did you two live together?" Sho looked up at Kei, using the blonde's stomach for a pillow.

"Eh, the next four years or so."

"When did he change you?"

"A little while after I began to look for my own apartment,"

"You didn't like it there?"

"I just needed to feel independent for awhile."

"Did you two ever have sex?"

"Where did that come from?"

"Just curious."

"A few times..." Kei trailed off awkwardly.

"When you were human?"

"Only once."

"Why only once?"

"I told him that...I loved him...that I didn't want him to hold back."

"And?"

"And he broke many of the bones in my body. Unintentionally, of course, but it just made him hate himself all the more."

"How did he do that?"

"The strength of the vampire far exceeds that of any human, Sho. We were created to kill. When I asked him not to hold back,"

"He didn't?"

"..." the silence was answer enough. "Every time he touched me, it felt like I was breaking. In reality, I usually was."

"Wait, so you always go easy on me?"

"Of course. I love you, and I don't want you to feel any unnecassary pain."

Sho sighed. "Why do you always insist on protecting me?"

"Well, because--"

"Nevermind. It doesn't matter." he paused, thinking. "Why did he change you?"

"I was mugged on my way back to the apartment. Shot in the back and left for dead." he winced, as if he was reliving the pain of that night. "I didn't have much on me, so they just took some bills I had in my pocket."

"At least they didn't beat you up." Sho wrapped his arms around Kei's waist lovingly.

"When they shot me, they hit my spine. While I didn't die, I was left screaming in agony. Apparently, even the human that Luka was with at the time could hear my screams over the sounds of the city."

"What happened?"

"Luka brought me back to the apartment and cleaned me up. He didn't change me for three hours."

"That _asshole_, why'd he wait so long?!"

"I asked him once. He told me that he was letting me feel...he gave me the chance to live. In his mind, I would eventually be able to live a somewhat normal life, even though I would be paralyzed. After three hours of having nothing to do but listen to my screams, he caved. He asked me if I wanted to be changed. Obviously, I said yes."

"I see...what about afterwards?"

"The pain of the metamorphosis...it was even worse than the feeling you'd get if you combined the time when he and I--when he broke me, and the pain I felt from the injury."

"That bad?" Sho gave him a serious look. "Or are you just trying to get me to change my mind?"

"I'm not exaggerating, and and I refuse to change you Sho, so stop asking."

"Fine."

"Good."

"...hey. Hey, Kei..."

"...Hn?"

"You finished your story, right?"

"Yeah."

"Well then. Can we?" Sho sat up, climbing atop Kei. "Please?"

Kei smiled blissfully. "Well, since you asked so nicely, I suppose I can't refuse."

* * *

"Damn, Kei!"

"What?" Kei glanced over at his partner as he pulled a loose white shirt over his arms.

"Look at this! Nail marks!" He turned, thrusting his back in Kei's face.

"Seriously?" He laughed evilly as he pulled up his pants.

"Yeah! I mean, look! All along my shoulders!" He kept his eyes on Kei as the blonde slank toward him.

"You're such a crybaby."

Offended, Sho came to his own defense in a completely adult fashion. "Am not!"

Kei grimaced. "What do you want me to do about it?" in jest, he added

"Kiss it and make it better?" at the same exact time that those very words left Sho's mouth.

Dead silence.

"...you're not serious." a scowling Kei ignored the pout he recieved from Sho.

"C'mon, Kei!"

"Fine." He walked over to Sho, turning him around slowly. Sho closed his eyes, wanting to remember the sensation of Kei's lips on him. What he actually felt was a tongue, sensually licking away the tiny drops of blood leaving the flesh wounds, and a tangible lust filled the air. Sho shivered as Kei stepped back, chuckling. "There. Happy now?"

"Th-that wasn't a kiss, Kei." He tried -and failed- to hide the blush on his cheeks by pulling a shirt on and covering his face.

"Your point? Only KIDS get kisses from their parents."

"Hm...well, you've been my parent for years now." Kei glared mildly at him. He wisely -kind of- changed the subject. "If you're my parent, does that mean we just inbred?"

"That's when someone has children with a family member. You mean incest."

"Is incest illegal?"

"In most places."

Sho turned around, gripping Kei's thigh in one hand, and his bicep in the other. He whispered "Then what do you say we break the law?" as he pushed Kei against a wall.

"Ugh!" He let Sho strip him right back down. "That was TERRIBLE, Sho. You nearly killed _'the mood.'_"

"I thought I was being clever." the brunette murmered against Kei's neck, grinning at the moans his 'wife' so freely let loose.

"Yeah, don't ever do that again."

"Fine." Kei's eyes widened at this.

"Really?" He stopped Sho's hands with his own for a moment.

"Of course not!" Kei sighed in disappointment. "If I stopped being cheesy, you wouldn't love me anymore!"

"What idiot told you that?!!" Kei exclaimed indignantly.

"You did." Was the simple response.

"When?!"

"Every time you say that you love me."

"I don't quite follow." he resumed his earlier actions, and started to undo Sho's pants.

"Well, you always say that you love me because I'm me." he stared into space, thinking hard as Kei flipped their positions.

"That's right."

"Well, if I wasn't cheesy, I wouldn't be me, so you wouldn't love me." he looked down at Kei, smiling warmly.

Kei blushed, lowering his head as he grinned back. He looked up suddenly, standing on his toes to kiss the younger man. "Only YOU would think that way, Sho. I don't care if you're cheesy or not, as long as your way of thinking doesn't change. THAT'S what made me fall in love with you, and that's what's going to keep me around, even when you're old, and wrinkly, and grey-haired. Well, maybe not wrinkley."

"Wh-wh-what?!" Slowly, they moved across the room, heading for the bed.

"Just kidding, Sho. I'll probably change you before you go grey. I don't need you bitching about your grey hair for all of eternity."

"YOU'LL CHANGE ME?!!"

"Maybe. If it's unavoidable. If your life isn't threatened until you're a nasty old man, I won't change you until then."

"Wh-what?! I'll be an old man forever!"

"Then when we got to a public place, I can be the young, able-bodied caretaker, and you could be my," he paused here, kissing Sho's neck sweetly. "decrepit," another pause, to kiss his cheek. "senile," his forehead, "grandfather." his lips.

"And if I were to kiss you in public?" he accentuated this remark with several kisses of his own.

"I'd admonish you like a child. After all, you'd be senile. You wouldn't know any better."

"Can vampires BE senile?"

"...I...I really don't know. Huh. Weird." There was an awkward silence as all hands stopped moving, so their owners could ponder this thought.

After a couple minutes, Sho gave up and started talking again. "So, Kei." he lightly pushed Kei underneath him on the plush bed.

"Hm?"

"How long did you live with Luka after he changed you? I mean, were you guys constantly together, or what?"

"Um, I don't really know." Kei was staring at the ceiling, trying to recall the years. "Well, we lived together off and on for years until he died. I don't have an exact number, but it was quite a while..."

"You do realize that whether you change me or not, you won't ever be rid of me. I'm like a parasite!" Sho proceeded to prove this by attaching his lip to various places on Kei's neck and make odd sucking sounds, making Kei emit odd laughing/gagging sounds.

Giggling, Kei tried to hide his neck from Sho in a pillow, but found that Sho's grip was firm. He laughed, thrashing around as the brunette found a ticklish spot on his neck. "Sho! Sho! I," he choked on a giggle, "I give! I give!!" Sho quit, having made his point.

"See? You'll NEVER be rid of me."

Kei was panting, out of breath. "I know, Sho." he smiled happily up at the love of his life.

"Well, that's good. So long as you knooooo--"

"Sho...?"

"CRAP!!" the brunette grabbed Kei's hands,stopping him.

"What is it?" Kei stared at Sho, eyes wide.

"Our reservations! I forgot to change them after our flight was delayed!!" Sho still held Kei's hands.

"Uh...okay?"

"Quick! I need a phone!" the taller man let go of his hands.

"Use mine." the blonde stretched out on the bed as Sho walked around the room looking for a phone. He smiled at Sho when he looked at him oddly, and turned over, laying on his crossed arms contentedly.

"Since when do you have a phone?" Sho started looking through Kei's bag.

"Eh, for awhile now...Oi." Sho looked up just in time to see and catch the phone. "I keep it, just in case."

"Why haven't I ever seen you use it?" he nodded his thanks, flipping the grey cell phone open.

"'ve never really needed it." Kei closed his eyes, deciding he wanted to try for sleep. "I left my number with Toshi, Shinji and Son, just in case."

"You think they'd actually call? Son, sure, but Toshi or Shinji?" he dodged an imagined kick, relaxing when he saw that Kei hadn't tried to attack him.

"I told them it was your temporary phone." Kei didn't even open an eye.

Sho nodded his approval. "Ah. That's good."

"But I swear to God, Sho, if I get ANY dirty messages from Toshi meant for you--' a sinister air permeated the room, concentrated around the corner Kei occupied.

"Oh, you won't, you won't..." But Sho was not so sure...

"Good."

"...unless he gets drunk. Or if he gets bored...or if he has access to a phone in general..." Sho kept his eyes on the cell phone, ignoring the dangerous feeling in the air. He dialed, putting the phone to his ear when he was done.

"Sho!" Indignancy as well as the same sinister feeling currently emenated from the small blonde vampire.

"Oh, don't blame me! It's not like I TELL him to do that kind of stuff!" Sho kept the phone to his ear, glancing over at what he could see of his love.

"Yes it is..." Came his muffled reply.

"Nuh-uh!!"

"Sho, don't argue with me." Kei's voice suddenly became condescending, something which set Sho off.

"I'm not a fucking child anymore, so stop treating me like one, Kei!!" Sho stormed off to the bathroom, genuinely full of rage. Kei's eyes opened at hearing the door click locked. He turned over, letting silence fill the hotel room. He sat up, the cream cotton covers pooling around his waist. He ran his fingers through his hair, exasperatedly.

* * *

[a/n] Geez...is Sho PMS-ing or what here? Bad cut-off space, but there's so much more to type...I ACTUALLY GOT THE INTERNET AFTER OVER A YEAR?!!! Now I have to catch up on everything I've missed...u-uh, I mean, update all the fanfic I've been working so hard on!! Ahah. That's it. Yeah...

Review please! Choco-Banana Pocky for you if you do!! \P"D


	4. Chapter 3

WARNINGS: Weirdness. Doy. malexmale relationship! Stupid jokes, and...no plot. It's like a soap opera gone worse...And language! Lotsa lotsa language. Apparently, Sho has been PMSing from the end of the last chapter until now...that's the only way I can explain his behaviour... oP

Disclaimer: Once upon a time, there was a little girl named JJ. And aaall she wanted in the world was to own Moon Child, thus having a claim to Sho and Kei. Well, one day, while frockling through the magic forrest, she stumbled upon a rock, which tripped her into a magical place where aaall dreams come true. And the blue fairy flew over to JJ, and asked what her most fervent wish was. "I want Sho and Kei." she said, desperately hoping that her wish would also be granted. So the blue fairy dug through his magical bag of wonders, pulling out all sorts of gadgets and toys. "Let's see...I've got a Sugizo, a Son, a Miyavi..." "No, no, no!" she cried. "It just has to be a Sho and Kei!" The fairy godmother smiled down at her, resuming his search. She pulled out item after item, until his bag was half full. "How about a Ruki?" "No." "An Uruha?" "No." "A Yi-Che?" "Oh, HELL NO." "A You?" "Nope." "An Aoi?" "...we'll come back to that one." "A Reita?" "Yeah, go ahead and throw that in there...but where are my Sho and KEI?!!" "Sorry. Fresh out." And away flew the fairy, knocking JJ back into her world again. She cried and cried for hours, until she remembered! She still had a Reita! So they forcibly married and lived happily ever after. Amen.

(a/n) -Looks back- Good lord, did I really write this stuff?! I think I'll just type what I already wrote, m'kay? I honestly considering giving up on this one...then, stupid me, I read my reviews, and I went all soft and was like, 'Okay. You can have the rest. Damn it. There goes the use of my hands...Damn it.' :D Enjoy.

* * *

Kei rubbed his eyes with the heel of his palms. He sighed, standing and walking across the ugly maroon carpet to the bathroom. Quietly, he tried to coax Sho out of the bathroom. "Sho..." His efforts were met with silence. He pressed his forehead against the door, letting the cold white wood cool him. He tried again. "Sho...c'mon, Sho."

Sho sat, his back against the door to add to the barrier. "..." He hugged his legs, trying to ignore Kei.

Kei leaned away from the door, getting a bit impatient. "You and I both know that I could easily break down this door."

"...Then do it." Sho's challenge hung in the silence between them, and was left unanswered.

Kei sat down, leaning his back against the door, folding his legs underneath him. He forced away the awkward feeling growing inside him. "I'm sorry."

"No, you're not. You're just feeling guilty, aren't you?" The bitter note in the brunette's voice didn't go unnoticed.

Kei flinched, knowing that what he said was at least partially true. "I didn't realize how much it bothered you..."

Sho chuckled darkly through the door. "Kei, I feel like...like you would, if I always treated you like you needed protecting, like...like I didn't think you were strong enough to defend yourself."

"I'm sorry." Kei balled up in the fetal position, resting his forehead on his knees.

"Kei."

"Sho."

Silence.

"I love you, even if you baby me."

"I love you, even though I'm a little conflicted inwardly."

"..."

"..."

"...You're kidding, right?" Sho snorted, before breaking out into an all out fit of laughter, laughing harder when Kei did the same.

"Heh...it did sound a little cheezy, didn't it?"

"I'm rubbing off on you!" Sho smiled, forgetting his anger from before.

"I guess so." Kei beamed.

The laughter died down, and the awkward feeling started coming back. Unwilling to let Sho close himself off again, Kei decided to do something stupid. Like, really stupid.

"Heeey. Shooo."

"What?"

Kei leaned down, looking through the small crack under the door. "I can see your aaass!"

"No, you can't."

"Mhm. I'm staring at it right now."

"You're lying."

"Mn...and it looks like it's just _begging_ to be _touched_..."

"Kei!"

"Ah, but sadly, there's a door in my way."

**"How can you see my butt?!"**

"So I guess I'll just have to settle for looking at it through this tiny little crack...mm...crack...butt crack. _Sho's_ butt crack. _Hey,_ there it is!"

"Kei, I think you're ON crack."

"Mm, no, but are you're offering yours? 'Cuz if you are, I accept."

"Seriously." Sho turned around to stare at the door. "Are you high?"

"Aw, where'd the butt go?" Kei all but whined.

"Kei!" The door was thrown open. **"DON'T TALK TO THE FLOATING KOI! IT'LL EAT YOU!!"**

"I'm not Shinji, Sho." Using his vampiric speed to his advantage, he pinned Sho against the bathroom counter, pushing him down enough that he was standing just a bit taller. "I don't need drugs to get that high." _Liiiiick._ "K-Kei!!"

* * *

"_Augh_, fuck!"

"Thank you, Sho. I had fun." Kei sensually licked his lips. Sho ignored him, groaning about how much pain he was in.

"And you SWEAR that you went easy on me?!"

"Yes. Nothing's broken."

"But it hurts like hell!"

"Oh, wah. You and I both know you enjoyed it at least as much as I did."

"Well, there's no doubt about that...You're not the kind to just blindly fuck, but still!"

"Mm." Kei leaned into a kiss, ignoring Sho's foul language in light of recent events. "It's almost mor...ning..." Kei slumped against Sho, his head falling into Sho's chest.

"Are you okay?"

_"...uhn."_ Kei let out a high-pitched whine.

"Kei?" the blonde pointed to the window. "Huh? The window was open...? The _entire_ time!? Meaning, **EVERYONE OUTSIDE JUST HEARD US**--"

"Focus, Sho."

"Huh?"

"The light." Sho propped Kei up against the counter, walking to the wall, flipping off the light. "Better?"

"_Sunlight._"

"I can't turn off the sun, Kei, no matter how hungover you may be."

"I'm not hungover, stupid...SUN LIGHT."

"Huh? Uh...Oh!" Sho quickly closed the window and blinds, drawing the curtains as well. He carried the smaller man to the bed, laying him down and tucking him under the covers. He crawled under the blankets with him, making sure every inch of them were covered. He hugged Kei to him. Kei wrapped his arms around his husband. "I love you."

"I...love you...too." Kei whispered, planting a kiss on the taller man's nose. Sho's arms tightened around his shoulders. "You know...you don't...have to stay...with...me." the vampire looked up at him from beneath his hated how weak the sun made him. Lately, even if he wasn't in the daylight, the sun seemed to drain all his energy.

A confused Sho held his stare. "What else am I supposed to do?"

"Go...have fun."

His husband didn't even consider the option. "No. I'd rather stay here with you,"

"Okay," Kei sighed.

"...and cuddle."

"..."

"..."

"I'm sorry...it...it sounded...like..."

"Like I want to cuddle."

"Cudd...le?"

"Yes."

"...Okay." As soon as Kei agreed, Sho nearly jumped on top of the poor man.

"Mn..." Sho craddled Kei's head in his arms as the vampire returned his embrace. "...did...did you just...?"

Kei wearily opened one eye to look at his lover. "Did I what?"

"Did you just...return my cuddling?!"

"I'm tired, Sho. Leave me alone."

"DON'T DENY IT!! YOU AND I JUST TRULY CUDDLED!!! _AAAWWWWW!_ I LUFF YOU!!!!" This earned a very hard smack to the back of his head.

"Shut up, you idiot. I'm trying to sleep."

_"Aaawww...!"_ Kei started prying at the arms that were wrapping around him. Any tighter and he feared they would crush him.

"Shut up, Sho!"

"But...I'm so happy~~!!" Magic pink hearts were floating around the pair...

"Keep that up, and there will be no sex during the honeymoon." Kei glared over his shoulder at the younger man.

"You and I both know you wouldn't DARE." Firm in this belief, Sho just squeezed the half-dead man tighter.

"Why not? We already consumated the marriage." Kei stated off-handedly.

"Not officially!" Sho was starting to get worried. Kei was being way too serious for his liking.

"And y'know, before we got married, I felt that I couldn't give you any semblance of a reason to leave. Now that we're married though, you're kind of stuck with me. I don't feel the need to put out all the time to keep you around."

"Wh-what?!!" Sho was getting REALLY freaked now.

"Hm...sounds like good fun, eh?" Kei fought back a grin as he threw this over his shoulder non-chalantly.

"Then-then I'll let myself go! I'll eat only Happy Pizza Pizza, and I'll drink SOOO much beer, that I'll get a _beer belly!"_ Sho was desperately trying to scare Kei out of this frightening mood he was in.

"I already told you that I'll still love you. You'd only be decreasing your chances of sympathy sex." It wasn't working.

" T.T Fine, then. I'll get so INCREDIBLY sexy and toned that ya won't be able to HELP jumping me. It'll be an automatic reaction! S.O.S! Sex on Sight!" Both paused as they imagined this future. "/// Oh, god."

* * *

Sho brought the subject up again later.

"Hm. You're already sexy, Sho. I think I could handle it." Kei replied, searching through his luggage.

Sho snorted, not looking up from the travel brochure he was reading. "Yeah, right."

"If it is like you say, I imagine that _I_ would be the only one that benefitted."

Sho shifted around on the couch a bit. "How do you figure?"

"You seriously think that you, _a human_, can keep up with my vampiric stamina?" Kei plopped down beside him, stealing an unnoticed sip from his beer.

Sho grinned, savouring the thought. "Well, I can sure as hell try." He looked over his shoulder to where the vampire had been, who was now leaning against his chest.

"For how long though? If everytime I saw you, I tried to jump you, well," the vampire chuckled. "that'd be a lot of sex." He ran his hands through his hair, thinking. "And considering the fact that we live together, and that we really don't have any social life outside of each other," he turned his chocolate gaze to his blue-eyed love. "and our mutual friends..." he lightly touched his hand to Sho's cheek. "Well, that's even more sex."

"Fine. I'll just stay the way I am. How about it? You don't change, I won't change, and our love will only grow stronger." Sho nuzzled Kei's neck lovingly.

"Is that a conditional statement?" Kei smirked as he twirled one of Sho's braids around his fingers.

"Of course not! Even if we DID change, our love would still wane--"

"Wax."

"Wax strong."

"You're right." the smaller man pressed his lips against his husband's happily. "You're right."

"...wax DOES mean 'gets bigger,' right?"

"Last time I checked."

"I don't get it. When you wax something, like your hair," Sho looked down to find Kei staring at him, giving him an odd look. "What? You think my chest is naturally hairless?" Sho blushed as his wife started laughing his ass off.

"ANYWAY." Sho ignored the smaller man as he literally rolled on the floor, laughing uncontrollably. "It goes away...gets smaller. So why does the word 'wax' also mean 'gets bigger?'" By this time, Kei's guffawing -yes, he guffawed- had died down to light giggles here and there.

"Th-th-think of the m-m-moon, Sho-oo. Wh-when," Kei's voice cracked as he wiped away a tear. "When the moon goes th-th-through the phas-s-ses," Kei paused, trying to catch his breath. Regaining his composure, he continued. "It goes through s-several ph-phases."

"Yeah...New moon, the crescents, the gibbous phases, full moon, right?"

Kei paused, surprised by Sho's extensive knowledge of the moon. The only reason he himself knew so much about it is because he had spent so many years getting to know it, night after night. "That's exactly right. When a crescent g-gets larger, they say that it's waxing. When it gets smaller, it's w-waning."

"I get that, but why does 'waxing' mean something different from 'waxing?'"

"Sho, the reason that 'waxing,' like hair removal, is called that, is because they use hot WAX in the process..."

"Oh." Sho put his thinking face on as Kei hummed, crawling back onto the couch, and settling against his chest.

"...Did we REALLY just have a ten minute conversation about waxing? On our honeymoon?"

Kei leaned over to find a cigarette on the side table. "Yup." He sat up, lighting it and turning to his lover. Kei exhaled, shaking his head.

"We're so stupid." Sho shook his head as well, grinning.

After a few pleasant minutes of silence, Kei stubbed out his cigarette, leaning against the back of the couch, his arms folded behind his head."I don't know. I kind of like it."

Sho stared stupidly over at the blonde vampire. "Waxing?" _'o.O That's...odd.'_

"Wha? No." Kei frowned, sliding over so he and Sho were once again lying beside each other. "I like how we can talk about something completely irrelevant and stupid, and still be completely content with where we are in the world. Completely in love." Kei smiled warmly up at the human, his finger tracing a pattern on Sho's skin.

"Isn't that what being in love is all about?" Sho placed a chaste kiss on Kei's forehead, brushing aside the blonde locks with his lips.

Kei melted into his husband's touch. "I like to think so."

"Hm..." they both sighed contendly, perfectly blissful in each other's arms.

Sho reluctantly broke the reticence of the moment. "We should go see if they plan to let us leave the airport any time soon."

"I guess. Although, I kind of like how we are now."

"Yeah."

Kei's face took on an extremely innocent expression as he wrapped his arms around the bigger man. "I'd be perfectly happy just sitting here, like this, forever."

Sho nodded his agreement as his arms encircled Kei's waist.

A boyish grin spread across Kei's features. "Although, this is even better."

Sho pressed his forehead against Kei's, staring deep into his eyes. "Mm, yes. But there's something better than this."

Kei looked up at him with big doe eyes, a slight, innocent pout on his lips. "Better than this?"

"Oh, yes. Even better than this." Sho smirked, pulling the smaller man into a kiss.

Kei smiled against his lips, just before gently pulling away. "Mm. You're right. It WAS better."

"But you know, there is something even better."

Kei acted surprised at this new bit of information. _"No!"_

"Yes!" Again, Sho pulled them into a kiss, this time a heated and passionate one. Kei moaned as Sho coaxed open his mouth, their tongues dancing against one another's.

Gasping lightly for air, Kei continued to act coy. "Better, better, can it get any better?"

Crystal blue eyes twinkled in mirth. "Would you believe me if I said yes?"

Kei feined shock at this. "It can't be!"

"Ah, but it can." Sho pulled his wife into his lap, their tongues battling and their hips rocking in sync as the atmosphere turned heated.

_"Aah...!"_ Kei moaned into his love's mouth as his hand found a way up his shirt and tweaked his nipple.

"Ugh, Kei, can we just move on to the BEST part already?" Sho grabbed his lover's thighs, clutching him tightly as he stood up and walked over to the bed.

Hopping down onto the sheets, he spread his arms open invitingly. "You bet your ass we can."

-----------------

(a/n) I ACTUALLY GOT FLAMED. AND IT WAS ANONYMOUS, A BLANKET STATEMENT ABOUT ALL OF MY FICS. SAID I SHOULD FOREVER STOP POSTING ALTOGETHER. Which is why you get both the last chapter and this. ^.^ TAKE THAT, ANONYMOUS JERK WAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! EIGHT THOUSAND WORDS OF IN-YOUR-FACE!!!!

Hey, do you think I should continue to call Kei Sho's wife, or husband? If you don't express your opinion, I'm likely to just pick one and stick with it...

There is a fine line between egotism and being cheesy...I loving writing Sho in a way that he constantly crosses both lines. ^.^ It's so fun. :D

Please review. ^.^ Flame me and die. ^.^


	5. Chapter 4

Warning: Swearing, and Kei invents a new kind of stripping... XD Read on, read on...

(a/n) Okay, so I'm (semi) over getting flamed...the reviews definitely helped with that. :D While I was writing this, I actually thought that this would be the end, the last chapter...But as you all are aware from my constant ranting, 'IT DOESN'T END. EVER. NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU WANT IT TO.' Yup. I got an idea, just after writing "END??? MAYBE??? DOES IT END???" ...damn this brain of mine. This chapter is particularily weird and corny. Just a warning in advance. :P** REVISED VERSION!!**

**Semi-important note:** I want to do a collaboration fic...if you're interested, either pm me or let me know in a review! ^.^

Review Replies: (Unless it's anonymous, I'll reply through private message)  
Mrs.T: Why yes, yes they do. Awww!! Thanks so much! Happy to hear it. Woo! New reviewer! Thank you for joining our ranks...*gives you cookie*

No. I'm not above bribery for reviews. XD I wasn't planning on updating so soon, but then I saw my reviews, and...aaaaw. You're few, but you are THE COOLEST, all of you! Soooo...1) *glomp* and 2) NEW CHAPTER, **DEDICATED TO ALL OF YOU!!!!!**

* * *

* * *

"Hey. Want to hear something funny?" Sho glanced over at his lover, who had his back turned to him. He himself was laying in the middle of the bed, his arms and legs spread out.

Kei rolled over, coming to a stop when he was in Sho's arms. "Hm?"

"I was a homophobe before I met you." Kei stared up at his lover dumbly.

"...what?" Sho nodded. "How can a little kid be homophobic?" he asked incredulously.

Sho shrugged, wrapping his arm around the blonde's waist. "I guess Shinji brainwashed it in to me or something."

Kei laughed lightly, thinking how likely that was. "Mm...maybe."

A moment's pause, then, "Of course, that all flew right out the window once I saw you. Even as a kid, I knew that you were sexy." Kai glanced up at him, arching an eyebrow. "Most kids only think in 'pretty' or 'cute.' I did too; but when I saw you, I thought, _'Damn, she's fine! Sexy piece of ass right there!'_" He jumped as Kei punched him in his side. "Oo-_ow!"_ Sho glared down at his wife, grabbing his shoulders and trying to pin him underneath him on the bed. The blonde easily switched their positions, but lost his grip when the younger man leaned forward and nipped at his ear. This spawned a mock wrestling match, which of course ended with Kei on top of Sho, his husband's arms pinned to the pillow above his head. "Well, I may have paraphrased that a bit."

Kei smirked, leaning down and pressing his lips to Sho's. "A bit." Sho's wrists squirmed in his grip. Breaking the kiss, he released his arms, relishing their moment as Sho groped at the sides of his waist. "Mmn..." He gingerly pressed his lips to the taller man's neck, trailing down to lightly suck on his collar bone. Laying back down beside him, he sighed contentedly, snuggling into Sho's arms. "You're wrong, Sho."

Sho glanced down on him, a little disappointed that Kei didn't attempt to take their moment farther. "Oh? What about?"

Kei looked up to the ceiling, letting Sho pull him up so he was leaning against his chest. "That wasn't the best."

Sho's reaction was the opposite of what Kei had suspected it would be. Rather than getting pissed and storming off, he chuckled and hugged him tighter. "Well, I'm sorry I'm not Gackt."

Kei lightly thrummed his fingers against Sho's chest, humming lightly. "Actually, you just beat his record."

Sho had to suppress an unmanly giggle, knowing Kei would never let him live it down if he did that. "Time? Intenseness? Best-you've-ever-had-ittude?"

He grinned up at his lover, pressing his lips lightly to Sho's. "Mm...not longest. He still holds that record." Sho shifted, pouting very childishly.

"And the record for intenseness, you already held." Sho blushed, looking to the wall to avoid Kei's eyes.

"But, yes...that WAS the best I've ever had." He rested his head against Sho, letting his eyes slip shut. He mentally counted down. "3, 2--"

_**"YES!!"**_ ...But Sho beat him.

He nodded his head slightly, pulling the covers higher up on the both of them.

"But..." Kei shifted, lifting his eyes to meet Sho's. "What was I wrong about then?"

Kei slipped his hand into Sho's, squeezing it lightly. "The sex wasn't the best part."

"Oh?"

Kei looked first down at their hands, then to Sho. "Nope. Afterward," he lifted their hands, kissing the back of Sho's as Sho kissed the back of his. "Afterward is always the best."

Sho grinned, wrapping his arm around the smaller man's shoulder. "I'm glad I'm not the only one that thinks that way. I mean, the sex, the sex is amazing, but the--the after glow, I guess--that is the best part."

"Afterglow...how poetic, Sho." Blushing, Sho chose to ignore him.

"Like, when it's okay to just lay on the bed and think happy thoughts."

"Yeah...happy thoughts."

* * *

* * *

Kei woke, shifting in the bed a little, his arm over his eyes to block out the light. "Sho."

"Yeah?" Not moving his arm, Kei knew that his husband was on top of him.

Kei peaked out from under his arm. "I'm almost afraid to ask, but, what are you doing?" Sho was running his hands up and down Kei's sides, lightly massaging him in places that felt knotted.

"Nothing." Kei flexed, then stretched, raising his arms above his head as he moaned. "Heh. Did that feel good?"

"Immensely." He yawned, lazily gazing up at his love. "Really, though. Why were you touching me like that?"

Sho considered for a moment. "Hmph. Look, Kei. You need to eat something, even if you don't like it."

Kei groaned, rolling onto his stomach. "Not _this_ again."

"Kei--"

Sho shrank back a bit as his wife glared up at him. "Look, I'm not starving myself anymore, alright?"

"I know that, and I'm glad, but still!" He leaned down until he was just a hair's breadth away from Kei. "You're still getting too thin. It's unhealthy."

Kei growled in frustration, ignoring Sho as he began to trail kisses down his neck and back. "Argh, Sho! Look, I'm fine, alright? The only reason I'm so thin is because that's how I've always been." Sho abruptly stopped his kisses.

"Oh, bull crap. I know that you can gain weight."

Kei glared over his shoulder at the other man. "Oh, really?"

"Well, yeah." Sho shrugged, starting to massage the blonde's shoulders to placate him. "If you can lose it, you can gain it back."

"I've never lost weight." he mumbled into the pillow, trying to suppress a moan as Sho worked at a knot in his back.

"Bull shit!"

Kei growled, not appreciating Sho trying to dissprove him. "How would you know?" He turned over, knocking Sho's hands away in the process. The brunette remained unfazed, instead working at the top of Kei's shoulders as he straddled him.

"Easy. As often as we've got our hands on each other, it's kind of hard to not notice the fact that you, a fully-grown (sorta) man," he paused, kissing Kei's forehead as the blonde glared up at him.

"Vampire."

"You're still a man."

"I'm not a human."

"But I mean gender-wise."

"Then say male."

Sho chuckled half-heartedly, somewhat annoyed. "Sinse when are you so touchy about this?"

Kei sighed, running his hand through his hair, a frown still in place. "I don't know. Just don't call me a man."

Sho grinned evilly down at his love. "Fine, then. I'll call you a hermaphrodite, how's that?"

Kei growled, lightly punching him in the gut as a warning. "Ass. Get to your point."

Sho moved his hands to Kei's chest, gently playing with Kei's nipple. "My _point_ is that it's not _healthy_ to be a size_sub-zero!"_

Kei truly had to fight the urge to not smack his husband. "A size WHAT?! Sho, you asshole, I'm no where _NEAR_ that skinny! And subzero is a temperature!"

"Exactly!"

"...what?"

Sho shrugged, rolling over so he was laying beside the blonde. "Look, you have to bulk up some! I'm afraid I'll break you! You seem, so, so, so--"

"So WHAT, Sho? _Fragile?_ Were you about to call me, _me_, fragile?" Kei's voice got louder with each word. "The man who raised you, takes care of you, _makes love to you,_ and, most _importantly,"_ He sat up, throwing the covers off him, poking his finger at Sho's chest. "_provided_ for you for **years, **_fragile??"_

Sho grabbed his hand, knocking it away as he tried to keep from getting violent. "Oh, don't you _dare_ hold that over my head, Kei!" His eyes softened a bit, looking down at his love as he grabbed him and held the struggling man tightly in his arms. "Look, I_ love_ you, and I'm just trying to show you that."

"By _insulting_ me?" Kei glared up at him, using his vampiric strength to push out of his arms.

"By caring." Sho didn't attempt to pull him back, and Kei was stunned to see him looking so serious and adult. "By worrying. By trying to ensure that you're not the first vampire to _ever_ die of _starvation_." Kei laughed bitterly, hugging his arms around himself. "Kei, I love you, so _please_ let _me_ take care of _you_ for once."

Kei didn't loosen his grip, and refused to look Sho in the eye. "I'm--I'm not fragile."

Sho sighed, pulling his lover into his arms. "No, you're not, but you're easily broken."

"...that makes no sense."

"Well, you don't make sense either, so it's even."

"...what's even?"

"I don't know. What ever was crooked before."

"..."

"...?"

Kei chuckled, wrapping his arms around Sho's neck and pressing his kiss to Sho's lips. "You're so cute, Sho."

"I'm **NOT** cute! I'm **MANLY!" **Sho whined like a three year old, causing Kei to laugh.

"Hardly. You're just tall and dim. Okay, I guess that qualifies you as manly." Kei leaned into Sho's chest, climbing into his lap and straddling his waist.

"...Did you just call me dim?"

"I did. Wow, you caught that. I'm impressed." he sighed happily as Sho enveloped his lips in a sweet kiss, the taller man's arms wrapping around his shoulders and torso.

"Mn...your sharpness must be rubbing off on me."

"Must be." Kei smirked, pecking him on the cheek.

Sho gripped Kei's waist and the back of his neck, guiding him down so his back was on the bed. He gracefully settled above him, and flicked his braids over his shoulder. "So. Will human food make you gain weight?"

"I doubt it."

"Oh." Kei looked up at Sho, and was met with disappointment in the deep azure eyes.

"I'll try it though, if it will make you feel better." He patted Sho's head, who was now laying half on top of him.

A giant grin spread across Sho's face. "Aw, thank you, Kei!" He clung to his lover, nuzzling his nose into his neck.

"Hey, hey hey. Watch it. The swine flu thing has finally blown over, and we need to get out of here." Kei put a finger to Sho's lips as he swooped down and tried to capture his mouth in a kiss.

Sho pouted, speaking around the vampire's finger. "Ambd?"

_"And,_ every time we are about to leave, we fly into a frenzy and start stripping each other!"

Sho sat up, clenching his fist in front of him, speaking as if he was addressing a large crowd, rather than just his wife. "It's the power of the mere **WORD** honeymoon! It has ingrained its side effects into us!"

A coy Kei looked mischievously up at his lover. "Oh, what side effects, praytell--damn it, stop playing along, Kei!"

Sho nudged his idol's side. "Aw, c'mon. Play along."

"Stop it, Sho. Don't forget--we have a reservation." the blonde sat up, scanning the hotel room for his and Sho's clothes.

"Oh, yeah? Where?" Sho watched as Kei stood, walking around the room in all his naked, perfect glory.

"How should _I_ know?" he paused, turning to look at Sho, not realizing the eyeful he was giving the giddy younger man. "You never bothered to tell me."

"Just making sure, you didn't call someone and find out?" Sho licked his lips, somewhat distracted as his wife turned back around, giving him a picturesque view of his perfect, round--

"Why would I do that?" Kei snapped the perverted man from his musings.

"Maybe because you're anxious, and excited, and you can't wait to see where we're going."

Kei pulled a red and orange tank top over his head, wiggling into it, unintentionally putting on a show for Sho. "Mn. Maybe a little."

"Do you always have to be so sarcastic?" Sho muttered, leaning forward as he watched the lithe body moving sensually in front of him.

"I wasn't being sarcastic, Sho." he pulled the shirt down, then bent over to pick up his dropped brush, not realizing he was giving Sho a very sexy reverse strip-tease.

"Yeah, right." Sho licked his lips, not even registering the fact that they were holding a conversation any more. His jaw dropped as the beautiful man in front of him slowly pulled his jeans up. His eyes followed as the fabric was slowly pulled up the man's perfect body. He was nearly falling off the front of the bed at this point, he was leaned over so far.

Kei sighed, lifting his shirt slightly so he could pull his pants up the rest of the way, unknowingly displaying just enough of his hind end to get the younger man going. "See, this is why I don't bother to let you know how I feel. You never believe me."

Sho broke away from the fantasies that were already beginning to brew in his mind. "Hold on. _You_ anxious? The infamous, not-at-all-fragile KEI is nervous about going on his HONEYMOON?!"

Kei blushed, turning around and walking to the bed, his pants still unzipped. He leaned forward, until their noses weren't even an inch apart. "That's right, Sho." his voice suddenly took on a seductive tone as he realized just what he was doing to Sho. "I'm nervous..." As Sho leaned forward to pull him into a kiss, he tossed a pair of leather pants in the human's face, catching him by surprise. "I _do_ feel the same emotions that normal human people do, I just don't often show them." he looked down to his shirt, giving a fake grunt of disgust to convince Sho that he didn't like it, thus giving him a reason to tease Sho more. Kei was still annoyed at Sho for thinking he was without emotion, so he decided to be evil and continue to torture the poor younger man.

Bored, he grabbed another shirt and headed to the bathroom, throwing it on in there. He opened the bathroom door to find Sho not a hair's breadth from him, a sly grin on his face. Before Kei could dodge his attack and escape out the window, Sho had grabbed him in his arms, squeezing him tightly from behind. "Keiiiii...I'm sorry, but Keiiiii...I looooove yooouuuuuuuu...~~"

Kei sighed, hugging Sho's arms that were around his neck. "Then what do you say," he turned in his husband's arms, pressing his hand to Sho's cheek.

Sho looked down to Kei's hand, grinning. "Hey, nice diamond ring!"

"Gee, you like it? It was so weird," Kei stood on his toes, kissing Sho's neck. "this random guy I didn't even know just asked me if I wanted to marry him, and the rock was so stunning, I couldn't help but say yes." He grinned as Sho's arms wrapped around his waist, and he dipped him, kissing him in the process.

He pulled away, pressing kisses down his lover's neck, debating whether Kei would get pissed if he started to strip him again. "Is that so?"

Kei stifled a moan, standing up in Sho's arms. "Yes. Now, what do you say we pack up and get out of here?"

Sho sighed, releasing his angel from his arms. "Sounds like a plan."

"Good. Let's finish getting dressed, then." Sho glanced over at him.

"I think we should wear blindfolds while we dress." He smirked, inwardly fantasizing attacking a blindfolded Kei...moaning his name...completely vulnerable...because he couldn't see, anything would go...

"Uh, why?" Kei eyed the man suspiciously. "We can't see what we're putting on. Besides, I'm almost done."

"Well, that way we won't be tempted!"

"Ah, but see?" Kei murmered, shifting things around in his bag. "I can still hear even the smallest change in a room, and, thanks to you, I've become extremely atuned to the sound of the removal of clothes."

A perverted grin spread across Sho's face. "Eheh. I know."

"And I can still smell you." he muttered off-handedly.

"Hm...can you smell arousal? Lust? _**Desire?"**_

Kei laughed, sniffing the air to find all of those present. "Of course."

Sho's grin grew even more lascivious. "Oh, really?"

"Yes, and you stink of it. Sad, though, that you're not going to get what you want for the next few hours, unless you get it from yourself, or from a jar and some vaseline."

"KEI!!" Sho turned bright red at the boldness of his statement.

"What? You thought I'd forgotten? Ha! Hell no!"

"Y-you said you'd never tell anyone!"

"How is discussing it with you breaking that promise?"

"Well, because!"

"Because?"

"You know! Becaaause!"

Kei chuckled. "Heh. Grab the luggage, Sho. I'll meet you outside."

"PLEASE don't bring that up again, Kei!"

Kei called over his shoulder, "I'll think about it." He opened the door, continuing, "Don't forget to check all of the drawers and the bathroom to make sure that we didn't forget anything."

"Alright, alright, I hear you!" Sho sighed as the door clicked closed.

"M'kay." Kei walked outside, glaring at the bright light of the hallway. "Fuck, I need a cigarette."

Sho called to him through the door. "Hey, Kei. Can you hear me?"

"Yes." he replied, digging through his coat pocket for his packet of cigarettes and lighter.

"Argh, I wish _I_ had a vampire's hearing!"

"What do you NEED, Sho?" he asked around his cigarette, bringing the lighter to the end and lighting it.

"I just wanted to know...do you _need_ cigarettes?"

Kei took a deep drag on it, shuddering as the nicotine flooded his system. "No."

"Then why do you smoke?" he asked incredulously.

"I smoke because it's calming. Perhaps it's psychological. I'm not really sure, now that I think about it." Kei muttered, blatantly ignoring the sign he was leaning against that said _'Thank you for not smoking!'_

"So...it's a habit?" the blue eyed man called through the door, flipping his copper hair over his shoulder.

"Pretty much." the blonde replied, getting bored with their conversation.

Sho walked out, pulling their luggage behind him. "I think I got everything. Here's your bag." He passed the black overnight bag to his wife, who easily shrugged it onto his shoulders despite its weight.

"Thanks." A few moments later, as he stubbed out his cigarette, the blonde spoke up again. "Ugh, I can't believe that we stayed completely holed up in this hotel room for nearly a week."

"I can. I mean, we can't help the fact that our passion for each other took over our senses and minds, leading us to become one incredibly sensual, lusty, complete being." Sho responded, as if it was the most obvious and normal statement in the world.

"Uh-huh. Yeah. Whatever you say, Sho." His lover simply grinned in response, brushing the blonde's bangs from his eyes. He sighed, leaning into his lover's gentle caress. "Alright, so which way is out?"

Sho looked down at him, confused. "Of here or the airport?"

"It's in the same basic direction, isn't it?"

Sho shrugged, mumbling something that sounded like "Iunno." he paused, setting down their luggage as Kei gave him a soft glare. "I don't remember. I haven't left the hotel room since we got here. I just kept ordering room serv--"

**"WHAT?!!!** Sho, are you insane?!" Kei grabbed the bags as he started ranting and bickering with his lover.

"HOW WAS _**I**_ SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT OUR MONEY ISN'T WORTH AS MUCH HERE?!"

"Research, Sho!"

* * *

A little while later, as they marched down the hall, both still a bit miffed, Sho broke the silence.

"...I'm hungry." Kei laughed as his lover's stomach grumbled loudly, as if agreeing with him.

"It's still dark, right?"

"Yes." Sho nodded his head vigourously.

"Let's take a trip to the ghetto so I can feed."

Sho sighed, nodding. "Okay." he paused, looking around at their surroundings. "They should have a rental car place around here somewhere..."

Kei chuckled in response. "Sho, you don't have a driver's license. Not even one for Mallepa."

"Oh, it's not like they'll check." Sho muttered offhandedly, waving a hand to dismiss Kei's statement.

"Where are we? The States?"

"Yup."

"They check. Well, with your driving, it's inevitable." Kei shook his head, laughing.

"What's it matter?" Sho dismissed his lover's worries.

"What's it matter? I don't want you thrown in jail, Sho."

Sho snorted. He obviously could handle anything that would happen there. "Why not?"

"Because! _I _should be the only one touching that ass of yours! And trust me, in jail, without your guns, _you'd_ be the _girl_."

"..." Sho stopped dead in his tracks, the thought scaring him shitless.

Kei grinned mischeivously, and starting talking to himself in English. _"Yup, and that ass is **MINE."**_ He paused to look at Sho, blushing when he realized that everyone around them was staring at him oddly. He blushed bright red, ducking his head down to hide his red cheeks with his bangs.

"Kei. Hey, Kei. Why is everybody looking at you funny?" Sho ducked his head, trying to see his lover's face from below.

"Uh...no reason." the vampire shied away, turning his head so that Sho couldn't see his reddened face.

"...Did you say something _diiiiirty?"_ Sho gave him a giddy, lewd grin, putting his hand on Kei's chin and turning him to look him dead in the eye, their faces barely an inch apart.

"No. Yes. Maybe." Kei blushed, refusing to look Sho in the eye.

The brunette leaned down, wrapping his arms possessively around his blonde lover, whispering huskily in Kei's ear, making the vampire shiver. He ground his hips against the blonde's, earning a moan from the older man. "Please, say it again." his voice dropped low, causing the other man to shudder with desire. _"Just for me."_

Kei put his hands against his taunting lover's chest, pushing him away, his blush returning. "Stop that."

"Aw, come on." Sho grinned evilly. Unlike his seemingly reserved partner, he had absolutely nothing against getting it on in public. In fact, he thought it might be enjoyable to show off just how far Kei was willing to go with him in front of a crowd if he was distracted enough. Ah, but he wouldn't take it too far. He was the only one allowed to see all of Kei's vulnerable side; he would never let there be any audience but him to that.

_"No."_ Kei glared at his lover, walking past him. "Now, let's leave so we can get to the damn honeymoon already."

Sho sighed, picking up their luggage again. "How should we get there?"

"I don't know, bus, taxi, depends on how far we're going." Kei responded over his shoulder, walking out of the airport.

"Well, we're trying to save money, right? The way I see it, we would save by taking a bus."

Kei sighed. He HATED buses. They were so crowded and stuffy...although, he probably wouldn't mind being pushed so close into Sho... "Alright, let's find a bus schedule, and you can see if where we're going is on there."

"Mhm." his eyes followed Kei as the blonde wandered outside, his eyes especially lingering on his ass. He was yanked out of his musings as Kei jumped back into him, only narrowly avoiding getting hit by a speeding taxi.

_**"WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING, ASSHOLE!!"**_ Kei spat at the obviously intoxicated driver.

"Are you okay?" Sho asked worriedly as he helped the blonde get back on his feet.

"Yeah, I'm fine." he muttered, still obviously pissed. He dusted himself off, letting Sho take his bag from him. When he was done, he straightened up, his eyes widening slightly when he looked around. "Sho?"

He walked up to his lover, giving him a quick kiss on the cheek. "Yeees?"

He chose his words carefully, his brows furrowing in deep thought. "You said we were in the U.S., right?"

Sho nodded in the affirmative. "Uh-huh."

Kei nodded, glancing around as he mulled over Sho's answer. "Okay, then, _WHY THE HELL ARE WE IN FUCKING--"_

* * *

(a/n) KEI IS SO HORMONAL AND MEAN TO SHO?!?!? If I'm not careful, it'll turn into an mpreg...XD At least he'd have an excuse then. Ahahah, the whole reverse strip tease thing was sooo unintentional...These two are both total pervs, I swear... When they were yelling about fragility, as I was typing this, I had to really fight myself to keep it from turning into a fist fight and total spousal abuse! Sho, all of a sudden got really violent as I started to type! Like, beating up on Kei, then Kei running off crying type of violence...so I changed it...I have no idea how it went from the crack that I had originally written it as to something that dark, but... oO

Everytime I call Kei Sho's "wife," I get an image of Hyde/Kei wearing a white wedding veil and looking really flustered...sometimes in a white dress heading to their honeymoon, other times I think of him at the altar, in a black tank top and leather pants (plus the white veil), peeking around to make sure the paparazzi didn't follow him down the aisle...such weird thoughts I have...I decided I was going to read every single Moon Child fic on this site...because I have nothing better to do... oO THERE ARE NEARLY THREE HUNDRED. MOSTLY MULTI-CHAPTERED AND DEPRESSING. I've gotten through like, three and a half of ten pages. And I've reviewed all of them, at least once...But it convinced me that I should do something at least semi-productive, so I typed this up... XD

Review? Pwease? If I had a review for everyone of the hits I got... ^.^ You DO know you can review anonymously, right? Hell, you can review in a different language, and I would be happy. I'd get pissed at google while I attempted to translate it, but I'd be thankful for it anyway! :D Concrit is good too. :P SO REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And according to a little birdie, death threats work, so...REVIEW OR SHO KILLS YOU! BWAHAHA.


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